The Upside....

Friendship a Treasured Trust.....

2010-07-31T20:15:00.000-07:00

Brett, Cori and Little Miss Henli arrived in Sioux Falls on Wednesday to spend time introducing family and friends to Henli. Going back to Sioux Falls to spend time with the Albers family, dear friends and their Hy Vee family was a sacred time for Cori and Brett. Having both grown up in Sioux Falls, it always feels like going home. Cori called me this morning to tell me she had forgotten to tell me that Christy reads my blog, which in turn gave me the inspiration to sit down to night and blog. Thank you Christy!

It's been an extraordinary experience watching Cori embrace motherhood. Her constant care of sweet Henli is precious to watch. Cori and I talk several times during the course of the day. Everyday she sends me a new picture and we laugh about what is going on at that time. Cori is learning some days are better than others. Henli is happy some days and fussy the next. Cori has learned Henli's cries from being hungry, to mad, to just wanting to be heard. Brett is such a good daddy. The hours of sleep he has sacrificed, to be the lucky one to spend time with Henli all night is sweet. He loves and takes such good care of his girls. As a mother in law... it doesn't get any better than Brett... He is an amazing man.

Cori's return home was also a time for great reflection and greater realization. Cori has always been blessed with great friends and she herself has always been a great friend. Cori had the opportunity this past week to really experience true friendships and a greater opportunity to let go of relationships that no longer serve her well. It's difficult at any age to come to the realization that some friendships simply fade way, yet exciting to dust off other friendships which in the end are more treasured and enduring. Cori had a wonderful time enjoying the company of many 'treasured friends' and came away with a greater appreciation for those friends who have always been there.

Ethan went to San Diego with Griffin and Jackie. I am so grateful that my boys really enjoy spending so much time together. I really appreciate how Griffin is a big brother, a friend, a mentor, a protector and a great influence for Ethan. I love Jackie. She is a gem. It's fun to be around her and her family. We always have such a good time.

Kylie and I finished up summer school. We took a class together this summer, Philosophy 101.. It was a great experience. Fall semester we also have a class together... How fun... She has a good friend returning from the Dominican Republic in the next 2 weeks. It will be nice to have Jesse home.

I finished up my summer semester with a 4.0, one step closer to ASU and achieving my dream. I love school and have been blessed with such great opportunities to get involved. I am working on some incredible projects. This fall will be very busy.. but I am ready. My educational path is very clear and I am very determined. This semester I am on a full scholarship my original goal was to be on a full scholarship when entering ASU I hit this goal a year early! My hard work, excellent academic achievement and campus involvement has not gone unnoticed by faculty. It's amazing to look back and see what I have accomplished there is so much opportunity. I couldn't have come this far without the constant encouragement and support of Griffin, Jackie, Brett, Cori, Kylie, Laura and Terri. The list of friends who support me is long and treasured.

I have Nana duty this upcoming week! Cori asked me if I would come back and take care of Henli for a couple of days while she is at a meeting.... and I said YES! I will have another week back with Brett, Cori and Henli. Kylie is coming with me... we will have a blast... Nothing better or more magical than holding little Henli, experiencing a grand baby is by far one of the most rewarding experiences ever....

Life is about uncovering the treasures that await each of us. Cori I am so proud of you... Griffin... I am so proud of you... Kylie I am so proud of you... Ethan I am so proud of you! It takes courage to live an authentic life and stand firm for what you believe in. I am so proud of each of you for your character and integrity..

Dust yourself off, get back on the horse, return to the field, what ever you have to do: Life with Intensity and Purpose!

Carla

Henli Grace Albers, June 21, 2010

2010-07-03T08:27:00.000-07:00

Nine long months had finally passed. There were many discouraging moments of sickness, driving to doctor visits, dehydration and all around misery. There were moments of great joy, when the sickness subsided, hearing a tiny heartbeat and feeling flutters and movement for the first time. The last few weeks were difficult, sleepless nights, swollen feet and the anticipation of Henli's arrival.

On June 21, 2010 we all woke up early and headed for St. Joseph's Heartland Hospital. It was a gorgeous morning, clear blue skies, lush green rolling fields and a light mist hovering over Maryville. The drive would take 30 minutes. Cori was quiet, I understand her thoughts, concerns and excitement, I have been there. Having the opportunity to spend the week prior to Henli's arrival with Cori was special. Kylie and I had talked about this for months. Today we were going to have the precious experience of helping bring Henli into the world.

Once we arrived at the hospital, Cori checked in and was assigned a room. Once she was changed, her nurse came into to introduce himself and explain what was going to happen as they started her IV's.

It was hard to watch Cori has her pains and labor grew more intense. Cori is a strong women, she never complained about anything. Brett was such a great support for her. The two make such a great team. Within 6 hours Henli would arrive.

At 3:14 pm Miss Henli Grace Albers arrived. She was healthy, strong and letting the us know, she wasn't happy with being cold, the glare of the bright lights and being weighed and measured. The experience of being in the room with Cori, Brett, Kylie and the hospital staff was the most incredible experience to date. There are no words to describe how spiritual and profound holding your precious new grand baby is. Hearing her first cry, watching to see her parents respond and her mommy knowing exactly what she needs is amazing.

One of the great privileges of my life was to be present for Henli's birth. To watch my daughter bond with her little daughter is extraordinary. The feeling of passing the baton of motherhood to your daughter and knowing she has prepared herself well is one of the greatest blessings of my life. Watching Kylie hold little Henli as tears rolled down her face. Monday June 21, 2010 was extraordinary.

Cori also had the support of her dad, Greg and his wife Ann and her sister Grace. It was so nice to have them drive over and share this special day with Brett, Cori and Henli. Greg and I had the opportunity to reflect back on Cori's short 25 years on the planet and share treasured moments. Ann has been such a good mother to Cori as well. Cori has a very special love for Ann. It was so nice to all be there sharing in this special time.

A new baby who comes from heaven above, with hope, love and promise. Her sweet little spirit drew every one of us in. There were not enough minutes in the day to hold her. We all took turns in changing, burping, walking, rocking, loving, kissing, holding and admiring Miss Henli. We all laughed when she stretched and smiled. We all admired her dimples, blue eyes and itty bitty long fingers. Henli captivated everyone of us. Just her presence brings warmth, love and unity.

Kylie and I also had the great opportunity to spend time with Brett's parents. We so enjoyed our week end with them. Deb and Lloyd are two of the finest people on the planet.. Brett and Cori are so blessed to have such good supportive family so close. Griffin, Jackie and Ethan called daily for their updates, new photo's and video clips to hear Henli's little voice. After calling the boys after Henli's birth, I called Laura and we shared another milestone in our 30 year friendship. There have been many hard times and many more good times... Laura and I have shared, births of our own children, engagements, weddings, baby showers and now the birth of Henli. Debbie another cherished friend was one of the first to share in my good news. My dear friend Karen provided a buddy passes for Kylie and I to fly on. Karen was so helpful and joyful as I shared our great news. I heard from so many dear friends who are already grandparents... so they understand what a great 'club' I have entered into. Griffin and Ethan asked me if it was strange to be called 'grama'.... No I told them... it's wonderful. I also asked my children if they would multiply and replenish my earth... I could get really used to lots of grandchildren....

As I have pondered my life, the amazing children and opportunities I have been blessed with, I can only credit my father in heaven. Thank you dear Lord for your continued watch over my little flock, the infinite blessings I enjoy every day, the close relationships I cherish with my children, my dear friends, health, strength, the opportunity to complete my education, meeting the right people at the right time... Understanding my divine purpose. My heart is overflowing. I am so blessed.

Griffin, Jackie, Cori, Brett, Henli, Kylie and Ethan...Thank you for your love, unconditional support and inspiration... Together we have it all.

I love you all Mom....

When you follow your Bliss..........

2010-05-17T09:01:00.000-07:00

life becomes an extraordinary journey. I have become more aware of the "why's" and less concerned with the "how's". There is no question this past semester has been incredible and the opportunities I have had the chance to experience are only the beginning. Meeting Tom Nazario was the opportunity of a lifetime. His story caught my attention late one Saturday night in late January, while I was watching channel 8.. the educational channel... The documentary "Road Trip" nation caught my eye, but when I saw Tom and heard his voice, I knew our paths would cross and they did. His visit to Phoenix April 21-22 was amazing. It's hard to describe Tom. He is soft spoken yet dynamic, he is generous with his time, yet focused on his goals. His love for the forgotten people of the world is genuine and compelling. His personal story is one of persistence and courage. The story of his life parallels those he passionately serves. We are friends most likely old souls.. He has invited Laura and I to be his guests to meet the Dali Lama in October in San Francisco. I am in the process of getting my passport renewed so I can travel to India next summer..

The second highlight was being invited to a VIP event with Dr. Jill Biden, Bob Schireman the under secretary of the Dept of Education, President Crow from ASU and countless other dignitaries. The evening was spectacular! We met at the home of Sandra Day O'Connor which is now a historical site. Dr. Biden's passion is education, the value of the community college and keeping students on tract to complete their educations. Jill Biden is a lovely person, with smarts and class. I enjoyed our private conversation.. My passion is opening up opportunities for women my age to go back to school and embrace the wonder of education. It's never to late to set an educational goal and enjoy success. I made new friends..and the experience was life changing. Jill told me how important my story is.. where there is hope and determination there will be success and prosperity.

It's amazing how the greatest challenges I have faced have transformed my life into the greatest achievements I could experience. I am so proud of my children. They are all unique, talented and incredible. Having the opportunity to raise them alone has been the greatest privilege of my life. I have been blessed with great friends who are like extended family and love my children. It's not always been easy, it's always been worth it. Watching them grow into really nice and accomplished young adults is beyond rewarding. Learning to love them unconditionally has been priceless. I am so grateful my children have been blessed with the gifts of unconditional love, forgiveness, kindness, compassion and wonder. They are my greatest inspiration and they believe in me and my abilities to accomplish my dreams.

The times in my life when I have held on to tight, were the times I needed to let go sooner. Living an unfulfilled live is easy.... having the courage to commit to my dreams has changed me life. Leaving the safety net of a miserable existence was just the first layer. Learning to love myself from the inside out, accepting my gifts and talents and choosing my path have all been a huge part of my self discovery. All in all.... my results are amazing. I feel completely alive following my bliss.

Today exercise your courage.. it's OK to be unique, be who you are, if your not sure, spend quality time with yourself. Invest in you. Follow your bliss with intensity and purpose.

Mother's Day ..

2010-05-09T17:37:00.000-07:00

It has been a wonderful day. I wanted to capture my thoughts and feelings as I am sitting in my office and my house is quiet. My adventures in Motherhood have span 27 years. There are so many thoughts, feelings and experiences that my heart is full. My children are such a gift. When Greg and I started our life together many years ago we both shared an love of children and a want to start our own family. It's hard to share the feelings of love I have for each of my children. I am so proud of each of them. Each one brings a unique dimension of love and inspiration into my life. A reward of Motherhood.... enjoying the fruits of my labors...Watching my children grow into absolutely amazing adults who are great friends in turn. They love each other, support each other, stay in close touch and really enjoy the time they have to spend together. As I spoke to Cori this afternoon, I smiled as I thought within a few short weeks she will also start her journey as a new mother.. Her role of a lifetime. Cori will make an exceptional mother. To hear the excitement in her voice touches me to my very core. I will take on the role of "Grand".... still working on that part... but grand it shall be.

To celebrate my mother, we had her come to breakfast yesterday. I made some of her favorite things, had a few of her favorite magazines to read and we watched a movie. My mom is an extraordinary woman.. Her legacy will be her service to others. I appreciate the great example she set for me. We shared some funny jokes and stories and then she decided she was ready to go home. Our stop included "Sonic" for her beloved "Lime Ricky" a simple thing which means so much to her. Learning to stop and enjoy the simple things is one of the greatest gifts of life. Life is to short not to. I am grateful for the memories of my mother I have that I will always cherish.

It's a great time in my life, as I transition from "hands on mom" to grown children living their own lives...This morning Griffin and Jackie invited us to brunch, Lisa, Jackie's mom also joined us. Brunch was delish.. the conversation was outstanding and sitting on the porch enjoying the moment was timeless. Spending time with my kids is time well spent. I love their positive energy.. I love to hear them laugh and reminisce about growing up... I love to hear them talk of the future, their families and the incredible opportunities that await them. I smile and catalog their expressions and the sounds of their laughter.. I hold them close when we hug and always tell them how much I love them. Being a mother has been the role of my life. I have succeeded in raising four of the most amazing children. A job well done.. the measure of my success is evident through the relationships we have built together. We as a family have learned to communicate through the hard times, develop a deep abiding respect for each other never resorting to undermining with criticism or sarcasm. We are not in competition with each other rather a cohesive family unit who love, encourage and completely support one another.

Today as memories flooded my mind, the constant theme of my thoughts was... How profoundly blessed and watched over I have been. The Lord has been so good to me and my children. The past few weeks have been extraordinary with the people who have come into my life and the experiences I have had. I understand the power of surrounding myself with positive and inspiring people who support my dreams. I understand the power of intention and it's role in assisting me in creating the life I know is within my reach. Dreams really do come true...

Happy Mother's Day!

May 3, 1985

2010-05-03T22:04:00.000-07:00

25 years ago today I was resting comfortably at Alta View Hospital, my beautiful daughter Cori was born. Cori wasn't due until May 31, however on May 3, 1985 Cori decided early that morning she'd had enough.. It was time to upgrade to more leg room and wide open spaces. The morning was overcast and rainy as we started the 30 minute commute to Alta View Hospital in Sandy Utah. The decision was made shortly after I had arrived.. I would not be able to deliver Cori and would need emergency surgery. Cori arrived around 2:30 in the afternoon. She was gorgeous from the start. Her olive skin and jet black hair was incredible. I remember being overwhelmed with such emotion as I had those first few precious moments with her.

Life is funny...some days drag on and on, while others pass in the twinkling of an eye, but the years all fly by. As I pondered on the last 25 years.. where can I start? so many memories and treasured moments.. so many kisses, lots of ouchies, some girl drama, superman pajamas's, battles over wearing hair bows, blue eyes, piano lessons, turning 8, the scooter accident, 9 stitches, Hannah dog, TCBY, Gigglebees, The Empire Mall, The Gap, basketball, sleep overs, Hy Vee, driving, prom, The Last of the Mohicans, Titanic x 12 :)..friends, tears, hugs, loves, Christmas, traveling Europe, Mexico and the birds,Sex and the City, Designer handbags, shoes, Waldo's, eyebrow waxing,tanning,true love and Brett.

Cori is going to experience motherhood in June, she has prepared herself well for this moment. Cori is going to be an exceptional mother. I am so very proud of her. It's been so fun to hear her talk about the little details that make a pregnancy so grand... feeling sick, feeling better, ah! feeling the baby move, watching a 3D scan, the phone call.. MOM WE ARE HAVING A GIRL!, counting her fingers and toes, anticipation... assembling the perfect nursery, making sure every detail is taken care of. Watching her open shower presents and knowing she is feeling overwhelmed with love and excitement. Watching her grown into a beautiful young mother and been a privilege.

Cori you are simply amazing. Your accomplishments in life are many, and the possibilities that await you are endless. You have lived well, laughed much and loved with all of your heart. Continue to live your life with intensity and purpose, after all I believe you have the ability to change the world.

I adore you Cork! Happy Birthday ..

We are having a baby :>) soon!

The Invitation.....and Greater Opportunity!

2010-05-02T13:10:00.000-07:00

I was just coming off an extraordinary week of meeting Professor Thomas Nazario when I received a phone call inviting me to attend a special VIP event with local dignitaries from the Maricopa Community College system, Northern Arizona University and ASU. The special guest was Dr. Jill Biden. The opportunity of the meeting was to discuss the importance of the Community College and retaining student while preparing to transfer to a university and complete a bachelors program. I knew little about Jill Biden with the exception of her being the wife of Vice President Joe Biden. I did my research and found Jill is an exceptionally educated woman. Jill is in her 15th year at a Community College in Delaware, where she teaches English composition. She also spent 13 years in the public schools, where she was a Reading specialist and English teacher as well as a part-time teacher with Rockford Psychiatric Hospital Adolescent Program.

While working full-time and raising a family, Jill earned two masters degrees: a Master's degree in English from Villanova University (1987) and a Master's degree in reading from West Chester University (1981). And this past January, Jill earned a Doctorate in Education from the University of Delaware in 2007. Her dissertation focused on how to retain students in community colleges.

There was a small group of about 20 invited to the home of Sandra Day O'Connor located within The Arizona Historical Society Museum at Papago Park. We gathered after 5 pm for introductions and a social hour. It was incredible to see Air Force Two flying directly overhead on the way to Sky Harbor and within 20 minutes Dr. Biden and her staff had arrived and we were ready for introductions. I was one of four students asked to come and share my story of why I made the commitment to return to school. I sat next to Bob Shireman, Deputy Under Secretary with the U.S. Department of Education and Arizona State President Michael Crow. It was an amazing evening.

For me it was very interesting to be a room so politically diverse. Yet no one was wearing their party affiliation on their sleeve. The common consensus was an urgency to encourage a greater awareness of the community college and the vast opportunities and programs that await students. President Obama has pledged his support and the necessary resources to help students who are willing to commit to finishing their programs and graduate.

Little did I realize a year ago where I would be standing today... The loss of my job has turned into one of the greatest blessings of my life. The opportunities that have come my way to meet such influential people and work with them is extraordinary. I have relished every minute of this experience.

I am getting ready to close out my spring semester. I have worked hard and will have earned more than just high marks. I am learning, new perspectives, new paths to take, being open to the differences that make each one of us unique. It's refreshing to let new ideas take hold.

I am so thankful every minute of the day. My life is so rich and filled with good things! For me the greater opportunity is to live my life knowing I am my own person, free to experience all of the opportunities that await me, no longer burdened with old pattens of thought and habit that never served me well.

It's empowering to understand who you are.... it's life changing to love and accept yourself and your potential.. it's success when you apply both and live your life with intensity and purpose.

Carla

Road Trip Nation/Inspired Email/Professor Nazario

2010-04-24T14:24:00.000-07:00

It was been an extraordinary week. What started for me as watching a late night documentary on educational tv... turned into the opportunity of a lifetime. It was in mid January after midnight and I was channel surfing... I stumbled upon a documentary called "Road Trip Nation" which showed three college students travel across the Golden Gate Bridge to meet with Professor Thomas Nazario a Law Professor at the U of San Francisco. I can't explain what transpired next only that as he began to speak.. I sat straight up in bed, turned up the sound and was drawn in immediately. As the Professor spoke of his humble upbringing in Spanish Harlem and the difficulties he experienced as a child something struck a cord with me. After his segment was over, I grab a pen and actually jotted his name down. After another 15 minutes I could get his story out of my head so I got up and decided to google him. Oh My... His educational accomplishments are incredible, his humanitarian efforts are life changing. I decided to send him an email to express feelings about his extraordinary life and story. After about 10 days passed without hearing from him I decided to email again. In the back of my mind I was smiling thinking... Internet Stalker... Crazy Woman.... but that didn't dampen my spirits. I knew I was going to meet him at some point. So I pressed on and email again. This time.... JACKPOT... he did respond and said .... "Next time your in bay area give me a call"... seriously... even his response didn't stop me for one minute... I emailed again with gentle persistence... if there is such an animal... The good professor did indeed respond in kind.. which was the start to several phone conversations to follow and his coming to Phoenix to meet me, speak at Mesa Community College and create a presence of creating a meaningful life. On April 22, 2010 which was this past Thursday, with Laura by my side... we went to the airport to pick up Thomas Nazario.

I can't express how easy this meeting was. It's almost as if we had been great friends in a previous life. He is absolutely gracious, kind and inspiring. His presentation at MCC was very well attended by my kids, friends, students and faculty there was not an empty seat or dry eye as he spoke of his childhood, international travel experiences and then sharing "Why" he chooses to do so much for those who have so little.

Our subsequent time spend with him will always be treasured. He shared some of his most cherished travel experiences with the Forgotten children he adores. He spoke of his friendship with the Dali Lama, spending extended time with him and traveling around Tibet. He talked about his opportunity to share his work with Oprah and Larry King. In addition to his remarkable experiences, stamina and work in progress.. he is charming, witty and warm.

My heart is full today as I express profound gratitude to Tom for taking a "chance" and responding in kind to my email. His inspiration of creating a meaningful life as affected many who are in kind getting involved to share their resources to make our communities, country and world a better place. How great is the worth of one Soul? ask Tom Nazario.... and he will tell you Priceless....

With profound love and gratitude....

Live with intensity and purpose today... there are abundant opportunities to make a difference in someones life today...

A once in a lifetime opportunity to meet

While you were sleeping.....

2010-03-31T19:50:00.000-07:00

I had the opportunity last night to stop in and briefly visit a friend who's son was in a nearly fatal motorcycle accident almost 4 weeks ago. Although we had communicated via face book a little bit, I hadn't had the opportunity to see her in person and give her a big hug, look into her eyes and let her know how much I love her. My friend Laurie is amazing. It's hard to describe her faith, courage and determination. Her world came to a stand still about 10 years ago as her beloved husband battled cancer and lost. Her faith never wavered, if anything she has become more reliant on the Lord. She decided to leaved California and most closer to her family in Arizona. Her story is compelling and her experiences have been challenging, yet she has never lost her faith or way. She is gracious, kind and witty. She is always one to open her home and have the "girls" over.

In true Laurie fashion, when the news of the accident broke, Laurie did what she does best. She turned to the Lord and asked her family and friends to pray... and then to pray specifically to heal his brain injury. She flew to Utah and spent the next 2 weeks by his side. Praying, Fasting and Believing.

The prognosis was grim, yet Laurie never doubted the tender mercies that continued to flow.. She thanked the Lord and continued to call upon him.. very specifically.

As Michael endured multiple surgeries, the days pass into weeks and his body started to heal. It's his brain injury that remains the most significant hurdle. Laurie continues to pray for a miracle.. she is optimistic that may just happen.

Then... a ray of hope... his being able to breathe on his own... a huge hurdle and significant improvement.. One day Michael will understand the faith, courage and perseverance his mother has developed. One day he will hear of the fasting, prayers and blessings on his behalf.. While he was sleeping.

I was thinking about life.. and what goes on behind the scenes while we are sleeping.. it's almost as if... there is a sky filled with little angels who arrive during the night to answer each prayer individually. Prayers for our families, for friends, for neighbors.. prayers for safety, good health, employment opportunities and peace. Prayers for healing, forgiveness, understanding and overcoming adversity. Prayers for change and personal growth.. Prayers to connect with God, to feel his divine presence in our lives.

Laurie and I shared a smile and laugh as we both said.. I wonder what he has been doing while he's been sleeping...

As for Laurie, she is amazing. Her unrelenting faith and courage have sustained her, while serving as a constant reminder to each of us.. That miracles do happen and are just a prayer away.. her deep abiding faith in "Eternal Families" gives her the comfort in knowing.. she has family just on the other side of the veil who are also pulling for Michael and his speedy recovery.

It's a good day to give thanks.... for life, health, love and yes... opportunities to grow..Thank you dear Lord... for keeping watch... "while we are sleeping".

Infinite Blessings

A Baby Shower

2010-02-28T10:08:00.000-08:00

We gathered together yesterday to celebrate Cori & Brett by showering them with love, support and little pink things. My two very dear friends asked if they could throw Cori a shower. Debbie and Laura are amazing "shower planners" and soon plans were underway to gather addresses, find the perfect invitations and most importantly to find the perfect place. Everything was planned to perfection. Cori and Brett arrived late Friday night.. It was so fun to see Cori.. she looks amazing and is such a beautiful little mommy to be. Friday was a play day as Laura flew in, we met up with my sweet niece Alex and my mom. Alex is getting married March 11 and shared her excitement and details of her upcoming wedding. My mom is so excited about her first "great-grand baby" we took her shopping and then to lunch. My mom has always enjoyed a special and close relationship with Cori while Cori loved spending time with her grandmother. We had a nice morning, following by an afternoon of connecting with Debbie, running errands and shopping for the shower. I have been blessed with such great friends...

When Laura, Debbie and I get to spend time together we make every minute count... running, shopping and talking... well into the wee hours of the morning. We also have great stories to share and many laughs to be had.

The shower was so fun... I want to thank my sweet friends who came to support Cori and Brett, for those unable to attend their cards of congratulations came pouring in.. Brett's grandparents who are wintering in Mesa.. came and joined the celebration.. they are just darling. We enjoyed seeing them so much. Karen's gift of "baby RayBan's" may have just top the gotta have list. It was so fun to have you all there... A heartfelt thank you to all who attended....

It was "Bliss" to have my children all together. What a blessing to have such incredibly nice kids. We spent the afternoon together getting in a photo shoot, catching dinner and a movie. My kids love my friends who have been such an integral part of their lives showering them with love, advice and inspiration. It's so fun to all get together and spend time talking, laughing and reminiscing. It's so rewarding to see my children growing into great friends who love, respect and support each other. The next few days will be spend together, pampering Cori and Brett, taking in favorite restaurants, spending time with grandparents and treasured friends...

I am so blessed... Today as I blog while the rain gently falls outside.. I am reminded of the truly important relationships in my life. There is nothing more important than feeling connected to your children and knowing they feel equally connected to you.. the A baby is a celebration of life, opportunity and hope... Cori, you and Brett will be such good parents. You have spent time planning and preparing, reading and getting ready... The love you and Brett share will be passed on to your little one. Your little daughter will grown up in a home where love is the foundation. Kind words, encouragement and teamwork will serve your family well. I am so excited and thrilled I am such a huge part of your joy!

A baby shower.... the perfect way to usher in our anticipation of the Stork's arrival... in June...

"Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice!"

2010-02-13T06:32:00.000-08:00

Ethan, Kylie and I went into Thursday with "Great Expectations"! Cori my daughter who is expecting her 1st baby was scheduled for a 2nd Ultrasound. We all made our predictions on the sex of the baby...some of us were on the blue side, while others were positive that pink would prevail. Then in a bold statement...my son in law, Brett laid his hand on table.. he proudly declared his prediction was absolutely "Pink".... Thursday morning drug on... I found myself holding my phone close for any communication come from St. Joe Missouri.... Ethan and Kylie kept calling and texting..any word? yet? At 1:30 my phone did ring and with great anticipation I answered the call... and sure enough Cori in her playful way let me know everything was great! The baby was healthy, active and smiling... We were laughing and crying when she told me, "Mom, Brett was right... we are having a "GIRL" and the tears continued to fall. Cori took Brett to lunch to celebrate "his being right"... funny how daddy's just know especially when it comes to their little girls...

My heart was filled with so many emotions.. First the overwhelming feeling of gratitude. To know that Cori is finally starting to feel better and the baby is healthy and growing strong is a blessing. One of the hard things for me is living so far way and not being able help her as she has been so sick or to see the physical changes at occur on a weekly basis so Brett snapped a precious photo (the only photo I have seen) of Cori and sent it to me. It was so fun to see her showing, smiling and giving me "2-thumbs up". Second knowing this little one will be blessed with amazing parents who have meticulously planned for her and her arrival, providing a home filled with love, a strong foundation and endless possibility and opportunities.. and finally.. coming to the magical realization that I am entering into a most cherished season in my life... A Grandmother...

It's amazing to me how quickly time passes. I have gone from being at home with 4 kids to have three grown and on their own... and just Ethan left for a moment.. Ethan is looking forward to high school graduation in May and moving towards his dream.. Time keeps moving.. and now here I am with my life ahead of me filled with countless possibilities. My sweet mom once told me she enjoyed her 50's and 60's the very most, understandably so... as a mother you start to reap the rewards of your parenting as you see your children go out into the world. For me.. this has been a most rewarding experience..

My dad picked me up from school on Thursday.. As I shared the news with him.. we both laughed... he could reflect on his two experiences of once being a father and second being a grandfather... now he is going to be a great grandfather. Today I am going to see my mom and share Cori's great news. I know how excited my mom will be. I am very grateful to have experienced seeing my mom in her role of being a grandmother. She was an excellent teacher and loved every minute of having her grandchildren around her... her lessons are now going to influence yet another generation.

My best friends have planned a "Baby Shower" and celebration for Cori in the next couple of weeks. We will all come together to celebrate life, love and possibility.

Today is absolutely Pink bliss...

Personal Responsibility.....

2010-02-05T07:46:00.000-08:00

I was getting into my day when a story on the news caught my attention. A 9 year old girl had given birth to a 6 pound baby boy.. At first I was sure I misunderstood, a 9 year old having a baby???? I guess for hardened news reporters even this story was shocking.. I thought of my own two daughters trying to recall what their lives where like at 9. I remember church activities, piano lessons, basketball teams, softball games, sleep overs, friends, trips to the mall to hang out, talking on the telephone, watching TV and walking up to the corner for a yogurt being kids. I was saddened by the loss this 9 year old girl will be faced with through out her life especially the loss of her innocence and childhood.

My world has changed significantly since I embarked on marriage and motherhood 28 years ago. The line between black and white has been reduced to a gray matter. Entertainment has evolved into a platform of "Hollywood" activists, movies are filled with violence, language, sexual content which is labeled ... artistic and edgy. Music is filled with angry lyrics degrading humanity, sexuality and language now identified with a Parental Warning Label. TV has also evolved... no longer does "Father know Best"..... we have become a society "Lost" within "24" ... sex, violence, teenagers experiment with drugs, alcohol and sex in the comfort of your family room. Cable and satellite bring more stations with more and more of the same. Is it any wonder kids are confused, angry and desperate for attention?

I am blessed. My children who range in age from 26-18 are simply amazing, uniquely different and each focused on making their mark.. I used to think Hillary Clinton was crazy when she said, "It takes a village to raise a child" now I understand her wisdom. As a single parent I also struggled with positive role male role models for my children. I have experience many Monday Morning Quarterbacks during the past 13 years.. Those who are willing to dispense destructive criticism ... always willing and quick to point out perceived fault in my parenting abilities or choices my children had made... yet not one of them single nor what I would call a great role model especially within their own families...and never willing to walk a mile in my shoes. Yet in my village I have acquired a tremendous circle of great role models who have loved unconditionally, encouraged and inspired the possibilities of each of my children. Today I see the profound wisdom in the "Village". There is no way I could have raised my children by myself... I was blessed with great Bishops, excellent home teachers and ward members who just loved and accepted my family as an extension of theirs. To my cherished friends... you have seen each of my children grow into amazing young adults, you have celebrated tremendous accomplishments, marriage, college and high school graduations and the everyday experiences that make life so grand, and now we celebrate a baby coming... A heartfelt thank you to those who not only understand... but have chosen to make a difference in the lives of my children by feeling a sense of personal responsibility.

I have learned that life doesn't come in a perfectly wrapped package... Lessons, adversity and challenges are rarely planned for... In light of those lessons.. I have learned that personal responsibility can't be forced, or demanded but simply emulated. Like the famous poem of "Children Learn what they Live".. If a child lives in love they learn how to show love... Much the same, if we raise our children with a foundation of personal responsibility they will learn to live in the realm of personal responsibility. This does not mean that mistakes will be avoided... or the pain we experience from bad choices won't be felt.. As Proverbs... would suggest . "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." [Proverbs 22:6] For me this has meant... teaching my children to do the very best I can in light of being human.

For me, age has been a great friend. Learning can be very painful yet empowering.. Understanding can be enlightening and life changing... The opportunities for personal growth and evolution knock at our doors every day... the question is.. do we open the door? This past 7 months has been filled with incredible opportunities to reach, stretch and grown in ways I never dreamed possible.

Personal Responsibility is not a one time event... but rather conscious daily decisions that foster strength of character, integrity and the courage to live your "Personal Best".

I challenge you to live your life with intensity and purpose.

To Save A Life....

2010-02-01T08:52:00.000-08:00

On the recommendation of a friend I went to see the movie "To Save A Life". It is an incredible journey of a young man, Jake Taylor who finds his life at a crossroads after a tragic turn of events. He has everything, is everything and is heading to college on a full ride scholarship. The movie realistically depicts every difficult "peer pressured" decision high school kids are living with and making. Drinking, Drugs, Unprotected Sex, Popularity and the Pressure to Exclude others, Teen Suicide, Cutting, Divorce of parents, Pressure of college plans, Unplanned pregnancy, Abortion, Adoption and finding room for God.

TAKE YOUR KIDS AND FRIENDS AND GO SEE THIS MOVIE.

Most of us have experienced glimpses of Jake Taylor in our own lives. Having friends, maybe being popular, facing temptations of "peer pressure", drinking, drugs, sex, feelings inadequacy..not feeling thin enough, pretty enough, not having a boyfriend, feeling like you just don't fit. Feelings of why I am here? Why do I hurt? What's in it for me?

Life becomes most difficult when we feel like no one cares or understands.

Life presents us many new opportunities and challenges every day, that is no coincidence.. Our lot in life is one of constant learning, growing and evolving into the best people we can be.

We may never be called up to save the masses... But may I suggest, saving just one life certainly changes the outcome of future generations. When we no longer feel our voice is the only one that matters, we cease to have to be right, when there is no longer room for criticizing, gossiping and exuding others ... Then the life line of love, acceptance, forgiveness, reconciling and healing lifts us out of the depths of despair.

A LIFE SAVED...

The Color of Love....

2010-01-28T19:31:00.000-08:00

According to Dictionary.com the definition of Love is:

1) a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2) a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a spouse, child, or friend.

As I ponder the phrases profoundly tender, passionate affection for another and deep personal attachment, I am fortunate I have experienced love on all three levels. How grateful I am for the blessing of motherhood. It's a good thing children don't come with instructions or a manual. How divine and wise is the plan of motherhood. Trial and error is the way we learn on the job. Yet we are equipped with enlarged hearts, eyes in the back of our heads, extra sensory hearing and the ability to love...unconditionally over and over.. The more love we give.. the more we get.

As women we are all unique in personality, appearance, abilities, gifts and talents. We are all similar in our uncanny ability to love, nurture, sacrifice and serve those we love. We all struggle with feelings of inadequacy, insecurity, not being young enough, thin enough or beautiful enough....I often wonder why as women we choose to be competition with each other instead of being "friends"....Ladies we are extraordinary beings... and when we work towards the common good...collectively there is not a summit that can't be reached... We have the ability to heal that which is broken.. relationships, hearts, homes and communities.

I have been invited to work on a project that is my passion. I am going to spend this semester educating the young adults on campus to "Rethinking Personal Responsibility" on sex and accountability. Can you imagine what our communities would be like if there were no unplanned or unwanted pregnancies? What would our community look like if young women and men took pride in their appearance and choose to dress modestly? Can you imagine a future where young adults respect each other and no longer seek to engage in abusive or unhealthy relationships? I don't have unrealistic expectations of "saving the world", I understand how great the worth of "one" soul is. To help one soul..is work well done.

If the greatest need we all have is to be loved and accepted.. what would happen if each one of us made a conscious decision to love more, judge less and forgive others yet ask nothing in return? Out of small things... proceed that which is great.

If you ever wonder if one person can make a profound difference within our world... I would like to introduce Nancy Brinker, she is the sister of Susan G. Komen, she has taken on Breast Cancer and painted our world PINK.. has created a brand awareness,and a foundation that has impacted the way Cancer is researched and fought.. One woman with a passion, a cause and momentum will change the world and those around her every time.

The color of our skin will vary, we may come from different cultures and different parts of the world.. but the commonality we all share, are enlarged hearts and the ability to see the color of love around us...

My dear sisters... join with me...

~ You must be the change you want to see in the world.~
Mahatma Gandhi

I would love to hear from you!

Women supporting Women...

2010-01-23T12:39:00.000-08:00

While the rains came and the winds were a howling... I was able to take a day off..from my normal schedule..so I pampered myself... I slept in... which for me is a treat, a delicious feeling of self care and renewal. As I was waking up I could hear the rain laughing, falling and making the joyous sounds of free fall dropping from an angry dark sky...as I enjoy the sounds of the rain, my body was telling me a delightful herbal tea would be a nice addition to an already lazy day. I grabbed my robe and slippers and made my way to my kitchen... Once I was up and moving it was easy to start multitasking in making a little something to eat, while flipping on the dryer, folding clothes and taking a moment to sit down and enjoy the warmth of my tea cup between my hands. As I was sitting in my down filled chair with my feet up sipping my tea.... I reflected the great blessings of my life... I was sitting in my home which is beautiful, warm, clean, furnished in my "eclectic style" with smells of clove bud and cinnamon filling each room with warmth and fragrance. I have food to eat, clean clothes to wear, a hot shower that beckons me daily.. I am pursuing my dreams of completing my college education. I am in new season in my life, with only one child left at home, my life is filled with new opportunities that are now within my reach.

As I watch the TV coverage of Haiti.. my heart is heavy, I watch the video coverage, still photo's, I hear miraculous stories of survival, new life, perseverance and compassion. My heart is sick as I have watch those who have died, lining the streets, images of mass graves, little ones who's lives were cut short. I read about Sandra Bullock, Brad Pit and Angelina Jolie, Leonardo DeCaprio giving so generously. I watch and hear of George Clooney organizing a Tele-thon to raise money and awareness to the enormous need of those suffering in Haiti. I wonder why this level of humanitarian effort is not felt everyday in our country, let along our communities.

With unemployment levels staggering in our own back yard, many I personally know are losing their homes as they struggle with financial ruin, marriages crumbling, broken hearts, shattered dreams, a feeling of complete and utter loss. As I talk to those who's lives are being profoundly changed... I feel there is much we all can do to lighten the emotional, financial and spiritual loads are sisters carry. Can you imagine a community where everyone of us works collectively to enhance the lives of those around us. Women helping women.. working together in a spirit of accomplishment not competition... We as sisters can change the landscapes of our communities. I am a firm believer of the power of one... teamed with the power of others makes for a strong unbroken chain of women who not only love each other, they love their families, love and serve in their respective communities, understand the profound nature of unconditional acceptance, love and service.

Just think...right inside the walls of our own homes, outside our front doors there are endless opportunities for us to make a difference every day... In an individual way... Once small act of kindness, love, charity can and will change the lives of those around us...

This week I challenge you.... Go ahead and make someones day... Smile, interact with your families, friends, neighbors, engage in random acts of kindness for those who you don't know, who really are in great need....

I understand the power of the little things! Go and report back! Share your experiences... Power in motion!

Flutter + Excitement = Great Expectations!

2010-01-18T20:28:00.000-08:00

Cori called me Saturday night and said..., "Hey mom, I think I just felt the baby move!" she said... it felt like "Flutter".. I can't even begin to express how treasured our conversation was... My beautiful daughter is expecting a baby of her very own. To hear the excitement in her voice, brought back such sweet memories of my own... Cori has been very sick, but always optimistic. We touch base about everyday to talk about how she is feeling, colors for her nursery, names for the baby... and of course... the big question.... Will she have a boy or girl? A baby shower is being planned in Arizona... we are all looking forward to seeing Cori and celebrating with her! It's a season of miracles...

My heart is overflowing...as I count my many blessings. We gathered this past week.. Tuesday evening... January 12th...to celebrate another milestone! Kylie turned 21. It's hard to imagine I have three children well into their 20's.... Yikes... It was so fun to see Kylie with her cute girlfriends... Kim who was so willing to help me, She has been such a good friend of Kylie's. Griffin, Jackie, Ethan, Emily, Brett, Erin, Kelsey, Hannah, Lee, Evan and others gathered to share great pizza, Sugarmama's Cupcakes, stories, laughter and celebrate her advancement into adulthood. ...It was so great. Last Friday night.. Kylie and I had a chance to spend some quite time really touching base. I am so proud of the gorgeous young woman she has become. I admire her faith, goodness and optimism. Moving in with roommates has been a great experience.. It's been fun to watch her decorate her apartment and really enjoy creating her own space.

It's just Ethan and I.... Ethan is about to turn 18... he will be graduating from High School in a few months... hard to believe... I have successfully raised my 4 children.... BRAVO! and the best part is... Griffin, Cori, Kylie and Ethan are all incredibly nice human beings... each believing they have the ability to change the world!!! How great my joy is.. when I look at my children, how humbled I am to know I have had an influence in their lives. How blessed I am to have such good relationships with each of them.

Spring semester starts for me in the morning. I am thrilled and ready to learn many new things... I am so blessed to have this opportunity to be back in school.

Thank you dear Lord...for your watchful eye, unconditional love, unwavering inspiration and entrusting me with motherhood. I am proud to report.. I have chosen to develop my many talents and gifts... I am making good use of my time here on earth.. I am making a difference... I love you dear Lord and express my profound gratitude for every one of my blessings!

with love...

Carla

Happy New Year!

2010-01-09T10:39:00.001-08:00

Oh my time does fly by....This year I enjoyed "the holidays" more than anytime I can remember. December is such a magical time..each day was filled with wonder, opportunities to serve and time spent with my children. Kylie and I spent an evening baking cookies, talking about life, love and possibilities...Ethan and I spent an early morning shopping which concluded with breakfast at Starbucks. As we sat there talking about the many things we were going to accomplish...I looked at him and said come Ethan we need to go.... Ethan is an old gentle soul... he looked at me and reached across the table to hold my hand and said..."Mom, everything else can wait... can you and I just take a moment." I stopped my self...and decided to hop back into that precious moment.. just he and I. As a mortal... I am not sure just how many roll over minutes I signed up for in my heavenly package... I do know there are moments and then there are "Cherished" moments. I was in that divine realm of "Cherished" moments. Ethan and I did take that moment to talk about relationships, life, dreams and the future... Had his wisdom not interceded on my busy behalf...I would have missed a treasured opportunity.

I spent time with my most cherish friends. My dearest friend just happened to be in town over my birthday week end... we had an amazing time... it's hard to image 25 years as passed since we first met. Laura is more than a friend... she is my soul mate sister. Her belief in my abilities, support not only to me and my children has been unconditional and always based on love. I am so blessed. My dear friend Debbie opened her home to host a birthday party for me, she is amazing. Not only is she a fabulous hostess she also has provided a foundation of love, friendship and advice for me and my kids. My dear friend Terri is always there to support...talk... help... My dear friend Stephanie and Marty came to my rescue as my car needed repairs..they immediately contacted me to let me know I could use their truck as long as needed. Not only have the Kurtz family been great friends.... they have also become family. Marty and Stephanie have both been a profound influence in Ethan's life. The Lord has greatly blessed our family this past year with new friends. My dear friend Karen... it's hard to express the fun and connection I feel for her. She is amazing. We had the great opportunity to enjoy many evenings together... we love movies.. and we laugh out loud.

Christmas Eve my mom and I were busy wrapping presents, baking and taking time out to watch favorite Christmas Movies.... My parents had a great time and we loved have them.... Kylie, Evan, Ethan and I decided to take in a late movie Christmas Eve.. We saw the Blind Side... Excellent...If you ever wondered if love can change lives... go to see the movie.

Christmas day was spent with Griffin and Jackie joining the rest of us... we had a great time. It's hard to express my feelings about my children. I am so very proud of the incredibly nice people they are... They love and respect each other..enjoy the time they are able to spend together. It's a blessing to have great communication with each and every one of them. It was a day I will ponder in my heart....

Cori and Brett were unable to join us... they spent Christmas in St. Louis with Greg and Ann. Ann had made special arraingments for Cori to have an Ultrasound done while she was there. Cori actually text messaged the three dimensional scans to me.. it was truly amazing. Cori and Brett will be here in the next month to thaw out... and Cori is just starting to feel better. It was very emotional for me as I heard her telling me how amazing it was to see their baby.... she will make an good mommy... It's so fun to hear the excitement in both her and Brett's voice.

My life continues to be richly blessed... My children are healthy, happy and accomplishing their dreams. Cori will become a mommy for the first time. Ethan will graduate from high school..My nest is growing smaller...yet my family is enlarging all the time... My schooling has been such a blessing and great opportunity. I am meeting very interesting people and learning so many new things.

Happy New Year to all!

Carla

Inspiration, Encouragement and Accomplishment!

2009-12-19T07:55:00.000-08:00

It's been a month since I felt I could take the time to post...My life has been filled with new adventures, new opportunities and new friends.. My decision to return to school has been a great blessing not only for me but my children as well. Many evenings and weekends where spent gathered around the kitchen table helping each other with homework, preparing for a test or just talking about the events of the day. As I look back..these are most precious moments. It was very intimidating at times as Griffin, Kylie and Ethan would sit down to explain the order of operations in solving a math problem. Cori was my satellite learning instructor, she is always encouraging me to stretch just a little bit further and try just a little bit harder... My best friend Laura even tutored me the night before my last Algebra test prior to my final. All of my cherished friends who applauded my return to school with words of encouragement, their support never ending. How blessed I am to live surrounded with children and friends who love, inspire and continue to cheer me on.

I have come to a profound realization in my life, it's not always your immediate family who have the desire or ability to be a support system. My greatest disappointments in life have come when I have depended on the false support of my parents and siblings. My greatest accomplishments in life have come when I have exercised belief in myself wrapped in the unconditional love of my children and beloved life long friends. My profound realization..... “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. Christopher Robin to Pooh” ...

As I returned to school, I made the following commitment to myself. I would give my very best effort 100% of the time...every day.... I my goal was to finish the semester with a 4.0 GPA. As I pulled up my grades online....the tears came streaming down my face... just to the right of each one of my classes was an "A"..the tears represented many feelings, emotions and triumphs...especially knowing that what others think of me no longer matters. I am braver than I believed, stronger than I seemed and definitely smarter than I thought....How sad that instead of celebrating the greatest accomplishment's of those closest to us, so much of time has been spent trying to undermine and criticize.

I am free, it NEVER matters what others think...it only matters that we Believe in our own abilities and dreams... I profoundly understand the person and I am along with my potential.

I am so grateful for the experience of healing, opening my heart and mind to divine inspiration and understanding how love does conquer all..

As I spoke to each of my kids to share my good news, they each told me how very proud of me they were. They also told me, they know what I am capable of achieving in life..... Out of the mouth of my babes.... They always knew...they never doubted, never asked why... They always cheered me on.. Mom you can do this...Mom run after your dreams....How very accomplished I feel on many levels...As I am taking my victory lap...the feelings of hard work, giving my best and then some, never giving up and loving learning has been a great experience.... a tremendous accomplishment.

I hope my continued quest will include working hard to be a 4.0 student of life...working tirelessly on improving myself...loving without condition, giving without reason, being a great mom, better grandmother, great neighbor, great citizen...a women who desires to be the change she wishes to see in her world.

Carla

Gratitude!

2009-11-19T06:40:00.000-08:00

I had a few minutes before class this morning and thought I would express my profound ~gratitude~ this morning for my many blessings. I am so very grateful for my children, who are not only my biggest supporters, they have become cherished friends. Words cannot express the feelings of my heart for the blessings of good health, happiness, joy, forgiveness, being able to pursue my education, treasured friendships and of course my Savior. I have been taking Matthew 7:7 (literally) "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you". How often do we find...what we have known all along....all we have to do is ask...and once we ask the lines of communication are open. Asking is power...Asking the the ability to identify what we stand in need of, while also assessing our greatest desires...it's energy and divine communication in motion. Seeking is having the courage to find...Seek the best things in life...love, compassion, forgiveness, understanding, inspiration....and I promise you will find a life filled with love, compassion, understand, forgiveness and inspiration....Knock and it shall be opened... so very simple...

Today take a minute to breathe.... instead of worrying, rushing around and feeling overwhelmed with all that is not going your way....STOP to enjoy the still small voice....ask for guidance, I know divine directions will come your way. Seek to find the Good in everyone and everything...You will be glad you did...for you will find the extraordinary qualities of goodness everywhere you look...don't forget to Knock especially on the door of your heart...Tis the season! Open your heart to the beautiful and unconditional love of the Savior who's birth we celebrate..Fill your life with Gratitude....Start today, live your life with intensity and purpose!

Sending infinite blessings to all of you!

Carla

The most wonderful time of the year!

2009-11-13T22:00:00.000-08:00

It's the most wonderful time of the year! Today as the brisk temperatures, overcast skies and very cool breeze ushered in the long awaited arrival of fall...I couldn't help but smile....The Holiday's are my favorite time of the year... I love the change in seasons, but I treasure the changes of heart that we have the opportunity to experience. Thanksgiving is a day to truly give thanks for the multitude of blessings we each enjoy... family, friends, good health, living in a free country, endless opportunities for education and business, food and shelter. All of the little blessings that combined make life so grand.

Then December...What a fabulous month...31 whimsical days of preparation, decorating the house and tree, baking, shopping, touching base with those we love, Temple lights, Christmas music, caroling, celebrating, brilliant red, green, white, silver and gold lights. Sugar Cookies, Chex Mix, Carmel Popcorn, pine and cinnamon smells..Cherish movies...It's a Wonderful Life, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman and of course The Grinch who stole Christmas just to name a few. Every time I watch George Baily struggle with that age old question of...Does my life really matter? My heart is warmed when Clarence answers him and says....~ Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?~ I love the gentle reminder how vital each of us are on this earth.

December is a magical month... a month where random acts of kindness and service inspire those who's hearts are touched to "BELIEVE"....I love Christmas.... I love the story of Christ's birth in Luke especially chapter 2 verse 19, But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart. As a mother, how often I have experienced that same feeling...The sheer wonder of creation and all of my blessings. I clearly see and feel the divine all around me. As a mother I see the God given potential in each of my children to live noble lives and to make a difference. Little do we know what lies ahead.. I "BELIEVE" the possibilities are endless, especially if we keep in mind..."We reap what we sow..." "We get what we give". Our ability to unconditionally love and forgive ourselves as well as others will unlock our hearts and minds to understand the power of living in the present, and accomplishing personal growth we never dreamed possible. To live with intensity and purpose.

I encourage each of you reading my blog, to leave a post. Tell me what you are grateful for and what you believe in. Bring the magic of this Holiday season to life. Dare to exercise the faith of your inner child. BELIEVE!

Carla

Reflections and Transitions....

2009-10-17T17:04:00.000-07:00

I took a deep breath and while I was exhaling.. I thought...ah...I know what's missing in my very busy October....a recent blog post. So here I am on Saturday late afternoon updating my blog. I feel like where do I start? So many feelings, emotions and experiences I want to share yet....not sure how this will all come together. As many of you know my sweet mom is in the battle of her life, Alzheimer's....is relentless, ravaging, unkind and uninvited. Last week end I spent most of the week end with my mom, we reminisced about her life, her joys, her pains, her accomplishments and shortcomings. As I was listening to my mom's stories, my mind drifted back to my memories of growing up, getting married, raising my own children and the next transition in my life...the "empty nest". I can vividly remember when my mom was my age... she was still raising her family, had many ups and downs, enjoyed great success in developing a business that she loved, she really cared about those around her. She was a giver by nature, and fearless. I can't recall anything my mom was afraid of. Yet I know she became a master at hiding her disappointments, detaching herself from painful memories yet she was faithful and continued to live through the pains of life to enjoy the precious treasured moments of watching her children transition into adulthood, marry, have children and serve in the churches and communities in which we live. I have been blessed with many of my mother's most enduring qualities.

As I continue to live my life, I have relished the relationships I have with my four children and their respective partners, I have been so blessed with cherished friends, great employment and now educational opportunities. I have come to embrace the realization that life doesn't always work the way I want it to, I am not only a survivor of life's experiences, I am thriving..growing and learning about myself, my biases, my capabilities, my ability to change those things in my life that no longer serve me..Courage to forge ahead...having confirmation that I am on my path..

I want to take a minute to thank my kids. Griffin, I am so very proud of you and your many accomplishments. I am so proud of your courage to live your life....at times when you have felt judgment from family. You have been blessed with great gifts...especially with knowledge and compassion. I've always told you, you have the ability to change the world...and you are doing just that...

Cori, I am so very proud of you and your many gifts and talents...I am also proud of the life you have chosen to lead and live. You are making new friends, and influencing those around you for good! I admire your strong will, great sense of humor and great love you are willing to share with those around you! I know you are change the world.... one great recipe at a time!

Kylie, I am so very proud of you, the life you choose to lead and your example. You have been blessed with great gifts especially with your testimony, your kind heart and your willingness to serve those around you. I admire the young woman you have become. I admire your courage to listen to your heart...Your accomplishments will be many...

Ethan...my baby...I am so very proud of you. You have been blessed with great talents and abilities. You are very in tune with those around you, always ready and willing to make an other's day brighter....you are an old soul..for sure. You are in the process of changing the world...one music track at a time.

I want you all to know how much I love and appreciate each of you! I appreciate your support of my going to back to school! I appreciate the willingness to help me with math! I am so proud of the amazing young adults you have grown into.

The past 12 years have been a journey for all of us. We have learned to pull together and not apart, for that I am so grateful! I appreciate each of you, your interventions especially on my behalf when I needed you all the most! Your forgiveness, your unconditional love and support, your telephone calls and text messages, your posts on face book....and most of all....your hugs, kisses and outward expressions of love... you all continue to fill up my cup!

As I reflect back over the past years and continue to transition into the future that awaits me..I know one thing for sure, my journey is unfolding better than I could have ever expected. Thank you dear Lord....I am blessed.

Serendipity…

2009-10-04T07:03:00.000-07:00

~Serendipity is looking in a haystack for a needle and discovering a farmer’s daughter.~ Julius Comroe Jr.

I love the word ” Serendipity”. Wikipedia’s definition of Serendipity is the effect by which one accidentally discovers something fortunate, especially while looking for something entirely unrelated. The older I get, the greater my understanding of “Serendipity” and how amazing this energy works in our favor. Many times in my life I have felt anxious wondering how a chapter in my life would play out…during those most difficult times it felt impossible to experience the “Fortunate” in what I perceived to be “Unfortunate”. As I look back on those hard times, I have developed a greater understanding and appreciation for “Fortunate Accidents”. Every experience we have, is perfectly choreographed in sync with our Individual Learning Plan…. Every life is complete with a list of why’s and why me’s. There is no question each of us will face loss, death, illness and challenges. On the other hand each of us will experience: love, joy, bliss, accomplishment, success, fulfillment and if we are really “blessed”…..Serendipity… Next time you are caught in traffic or feeling overwhelmed, running late or like your world is falling apart….take a deep breath and embraced the little accidents that have been thrown into your path. There are divine reasons we don’t always get everything we ask for when we ask for it…. To quote Robert Frost: “ Two roads diverged in a wood, and I–I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” When you choose to live in awareness, you feel the heavenly swirls and understand the divine nature in every breath and step you take. Serendipity becomes a trusted companion, as you look upon the events of your life with wonder. It could be running into an old friend you have been thinking about, being in the right place at the right time to help someone in need, an answer to a prayer, a stranger who offers a smile, understanding the power of attraction, love and forgiveness.

In July when my employment unexpectedly ended, I was divinely guided to start my own consulting business and finish my education. I was guided to the perfect advisement counselor who in turn has become a friend..as she has helped me chart my course. (Interestingly enough she just completed her masters degree in Social Work) she was worth the 2 hour wait…that first day I went to explore my options. Melissa as waiting for me. Every detail has effortlessly fallen into place. Simply Serendipity ! In the process of feeling uncertain I accidentally discovered myself, my dreams and passions….which is very fortunate for me.. especially while looking for something entirely unrelated. ~Serendipity~

There are no coincidences in life….. just glorious experiences filled with moments of Serendipity!

Today…embrace the energy of Serendipity all around you! Live with intensity and purpose!

Carla

Present yet Absent.......

2009-09-01T20:09:00.000-07:00

~If we all did the things we are capable of,
we would astound ourselves.~
Thomas Edison

September 1, 2009…. a very important date at one time in my life… My wedding anniversary today…just a date.. There are many important dates in our lives. Birth dates, Engagement Dates, Wedding Dates and Death Dates. There are benchmarks, milestones, landmarks and touchstones that signify great personal accomplishments.. New Ventures, new partnerships and new opportunities that await each of us.

The past several weeks my life has been a divine swirl of new ventures, new partnerships and new opportunities that have consumed my time which is why, many of my ~Bella Friends~ may have felt my absence…but let me assure you…I am present..

I have started my own consulting business, gone back to school to complete my degree in Social Work and have the great joy of planning my daughter Kylie’s wedding. This past month I been present while putting the pieces of my new business together, every piece divinely coming together. Pursuing my education has also proven to be a great blessing. Serendipity placed me in the right place at the right time…The right adviser, proved to be invaluable as she encouraged and inspired me…. I was very present Thursday evening August 20, 2009, when my future son in law called me, to ask my permission to marry my daughter. An unspeakable privilege and true Kodak moment of a mothers heart.

Last Friday evening I was present as we celebrated my oldest son’s 26th birthday, my future son in laws 25th birthday, the engagement and a new house. We had a blast! I watched my kids now young adults interacting with each other, congratulating each other, hugging, laughing, sharing war stories of growing up. Talking about the future. I was present and felt accomplished for the role I have been blessed to play in their lives.

I have made a greater effort to be present for my friend Claudia who is battling breast cancer. She is my hero. She is fighting her battle like everything else she does in her life with the utmost dignity and privacy. She shares her fears of waking up and having her gorgeous hair lying on her pillow no longer alive or attached… She shares quietly making her way to the bathroom not to alarm her youngest daughter who is present that she is desperately sick and throwing up would be a blessing. Claudia just smiles and moves through her day. Praying that tomorrow will be better, easier, less nauseated, more energy…counting her first Chemo treatment off her calendar…and focusing on getting back to her elementary school class room to finally meet her new little students…who have no idea what an amazing teacher Claudia is.

I spent more time with my sweet mom who has advancing Alzheimer’s. At times I am not sure how I feel about loosing my mom…this battle is hard, her enemy is persistent and unrelenting. She continues to slip quietly away…everyday shows the signs of a battle losing ground. My mom has come to the realization that: a box of DOTS makes the perfect day, a good Sandra Bullock movie with popcorn soothes the soul, Jim Rockford is a hunk….and Angelia Landsbury makes the perfect detective.

I make an effort to spend time in the service of my Lord. “Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.” Hebrews 13:2 I am present to give thanks..daily for the amazing and abundant blessings I constantly receive. it’s like magic…The more you Give the more you Get!

What is absent? Fear, Limiting thoughts, Seeking Validation Externally, Self Defeating Behavior, Discouragement, Despair, Feeling Overwhelmed…

Christopher Robin was absolutely right when he told Pooh…~“Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think!

Go ahead…Show up and be present today!
Live with intensity and purpose!

Carla

I placed myself on NOTICE!

2009-08-10T21:18:00.000-07:00

The most incredible phenomenon happened to me tonight. For Christmas a dear friend made me a gorgeous ~Vision Board~ which I am ashamed to say... sat quietly in my closet for the past 8 months collecting dust...NOT VISIONS! My thought process was ...I am to busy right now...I will come back and dust you off soon....SERIOUSLY...WHAT WAS I THINKING....Time will not wait for me...

Today Monday August 10Th, 2009 I officially placed myself on notice...NO MORE EXCUSES as to WHY I AM NOT LIVING MY DREAMS.... I would guess its safe to say...since I couldn't find the time to define my goals, it was impossible for me to visualize my goals...armed with a dust cloth, hammer and nails...I decided there was NO time like the present ...It's time to commit my Vision Board to my bedroom wall as a constant reminder of my commitment to my dreams and possibilities....with that thought running through my mind...The inspirations and visions materialized in my mind as I committed each goal to paper, complete with a clear picture of the end result. I committed to my family, career and personal goals the intentions in which I will transform my dreams into reality.

I am a collector of inspirational quotes...The more I feed my soul encouragement, inspiration and faith..the more encouragement, inspiration and faith I receive back like a huge boomerang.... I surround myself with positive thoughts, people, music, books and most importantly...the key relationships I spend time in are positive, loving and equally reciprocated.

A new passage has opened signaling the start of a new season in my life. I am in a state of bliss...as I experience the amazing opportunities that await me.

"Finally, what I really want is to be happy in this moment, where the magic and miracles happen. Stay in the moment and all gifts are added as you breathe and take inspired action" - Joe Vitale

I am blessed to have your support and prayers...

Live with intensity and purpose.

Carla

The Realm Of Possibilities.....

2009-08-08T13:16:00.000-07:00

Who would have thought...a very quiet and profound inspiration while attending a funeral service would literally change the course of my life?? As I sat in the congregation I was touched by the sweet tributes to an extraordinary man, a man I did not have the privilege of knowing in life. His darling wife came to see me, remembering my service to another family member I had recently served. There was an instant bond as we sat done to make final arrangements. I can't explain that bond, or the instantaneous love I feel for the families I serve. The associated and lead pastor were absolutely incredible. Their deep connection to the family and those within their congregation is real and moving. As members of the family started to gather for a family prayer the lead pastor was there to embrace each family member, offer his sincere condolences and gather them much I like envision the Savior gathering his children around him to provide, love, comfort and guidance at life's most difficult times.

It was in one quiet moment as the prelude music swept over me...I heard that still small voice talk to my heart....and pierce my soul. The tears started to flood my eyes...yet I felt so calm....such peace embraced me..and in that very small moment I not only knew...I felt the direction of my life change...and with courage and faith I decided to walk down the path. I have always been a hard worker...with amazing doors of opportunity opening at just the right time...In recent years I have felt very frustrated with my career path and the options available to me. My gift is the ease in which people are drawn to me. I have been told by many friends...My personality if like a giant magnet....I attract people into my life. Along my way I have learned to never under estimate the power of kindness, the importance of righteous influence and networking.

Today I am taking my gifts/talents and knowledge to a new level and launching my own consutling company....Doing the work I love, teaming with the families/churches/service organizations I have great relationships with. I

I have much work to do...I have great friends who are helping me every step of the way...another blessing...friends who encourage and inspire me!

I have made the leap ....I am breathing...living and embracing this place I am in... and learning to ALWAYS TRUST in that still small voice. I have heard...~the journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step~ I am present in the realm of my possibiilties....

Life live with intensitey and purpose...

Carla

Gratitude!

2009-08-03T14:44:00.000-07:00

The past two weeks have been filled with simply amazing opportunities! I want to sum up my week with all of my kids being together! WONDERFUL! Griffin, Jackie, Cori, Brett, Kylie, Evan, Ethan, Jennifer and (me) :) spent a long week end up at the Westin resort in Scottsdale. The pool was relaxing, conversation memorable! (Yes...what went on up at the Westin...stays at the Westin....) Everyone had a great time especially getting to know Jackie and Evan better. We had Grampa and Grandma Mannes come up for lunch on Sunday...It was so great to have everyone together. Photo's to come.

I was floating down the lazy river contemplating the past 11 years...years of growth, change and acceptance... just like learning to go with the flow..It was so cool to watch my kids interact with each other as adults. The belly laughs of those "Growing Up Memories", what my kids thought they got away with...and what I always knew... hearing them talk of their dreams, goals and future families was precious. The time together was treasured. I am so grateful for my children and their companions..its hard to express the feelings of my heart when I think of how extraordinary each of my children are...The reward for surviving the "teenage" years is young adulthood...and that I can celebrate! We enjoyed time with Grampa and Gramdma Mannes, we had a great time at lunches, dinners and the movies...We did some entertaining with treasured friends....Cori was the center of the kitchen on those cooking occasions. She is such a talent...all we could say was YUMMY!

As I type this post I have just returned from having lunch with my dear friend Claudia who is recovering from breast cancer surgery. She looked absolutely radiant...she looked adorable in her blue and white pin striped pj's...in perfect Claudia style, her make-up and hair...Perfect. She shared her good news on her positive scans...her recovery will continue to be a test of faith and perserverance..the good news is...Claudia's cup is over flowing...she always looks for the silver lining...in everything. She is amazing. Please keep her in your prayers....

I am in a new season of my life....SO EXCITING..... more to follow...

"The best way to find yourself, is to lose yourself in the service of others."
— Ghandi

Life with intensity and purpose!

Carla

Claudia and 525,600 minutes

2009-07-28T20:22:00.000-07:00

My day was SPECTACULAR....Debbie and I met up at the Temple for a little ~TLC~....My goal for the day...Clarity, Inspiration and Service...I reflected back to my Sunday school lesson this past Sunday, the lesson was overcoming Adversity. Websters Dictionary defines Adversity as a state, condition, or instance of serious or continued difficulty.

At one point I asked those in my class if anyone had experienced adversity during the past week...a few hands went up, most heads dropped, the silence was deafening. Those who had the courage to share...talked of fighting cancer, the surgery of a 6 year old grandson, employment that was lost, families on the brink of financial collapse. Every family feeling some overwhelming challenge...

For me the Temple is the best place to seek understanding and clarity. A place where I feel close to the spirit..prayers are offered, prayers are answered. I leave feeling inspired and renewed.

I have a dear friend in my ward, her name is Claudia. We hug and laugh every time we see each other only to say...We really need to make the time to GET TOGETHER then we let days, weeks and months slip by without rescheduling. She is absolutely an angel. Her smile is contagious, her heart always open, her hands always busy helping another..she is a legendary woman having the qualities of a hero, a woman admired and emulated for her achievements and qualities... she is brave, strong and in the fight of her life.

She was diagnosed with breast cancer in early July. Her cancer is aggressive and uninvited..I have thought of her often since hearing the news...I knew she was having surgery Monday..and decided it was time for our play date. I hate that feeling of....I wish I would have done...talk to sooner, called before now, written a letter...apologized....if only.... I went right from the Temple to Banner Desert to spend time with my friend, she was thrilled to see me.

She is a beautiful woman with the most amazing hair...her hair is her trademark..always in a very cosmopolitan bob...always perfect..Her hair is the envy of all. We embraced...we laughed...we cried....she was generous to share her story, feelings, emotions, dreams, fears, concerns and her afternoon with me. I was so humbled sitting there listening....I choked back tears while looking away for a quick second...I found myself trying to catch my breath....Claudia and I were discussing REAL LIFE and Death issues...her cancer became all to personal to me. We would be talking...about the little things...when a gust of emotion would blow in and suck the oxygen out of the room...Claudia would apologize for tearing up...I just held her while she cried, feeling helpless..Her day had been long, a day of additional testing...poking, prodding, emotionally she was spent.

She talked about her ~BUCKET LIST~...the summer projects she really wanted to start and finish...she talked about her sweet husband..and how worried she is about him...she talked about her time in Utah with all of her kids.. she talked about her sweet little elementary school kids, she is worried about not being there on the first day of school, she is worried about losing her hair...she wasn't going to tell her children...the she told me ..."I need their prayers!". What Claudia has is an extraordinary husband...Randy is her best friend, he is right there with her, her children and extended family, her ward family and numerous friends who will fast, pray and watch miracles unfold.

We talked about how sudden life can change. I took a rare moment to spend on myself a couple weeks ago...just to get reacquainted with myself...and reflect on my feelings about life, how I spend my time, what is mission critical, what is NOT...learning to incorporate love, gratitude,service, forgiveness in everyday living.

I am adding a post I wrote for The Bella Life...Enjoy...and take a minute to inventory your ~To Do List~...focus on Mission Critical....let go of...doesn't matter...

525,600 minutes - how do you measure, measure a year?

I took a personal liberty this afternoon; I decided I was going to spend the afternoon with myself. This chance meeting presented itself after weeks of relentless work and longer hours. I needed to decompress, regroup and recharged my overloaded and dead batteries. I felt the need to nourish my spirit and breathe.

I have always had a love affair with the sun. I love to sit outside and feel the warm rays penetrate my entire body. For me the sun has been a constant companion; encouraging my healing, helping me pause and take notice of the life going on around me - which creates the center of my universe.

Armed with my Ray Bans, i-pod, beach towel and bottle of water, I set out for the pool to find myself. No sooner had I slipped into the water…my i-pod on shuffle, I heard Donny Osmond start to sing….”Season’s of Love” from Rent.

525,600 minutes, 525,000 moments so dear.
525,600 minutes - how do you measure, measure a year?
In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee.
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife.
In 525,600 minutes - how do you measure a year in the life?
How about love? How about love? How about love? Measure in love.
Seasons of love.

I found myself reflecting on 525,600 minutes…sounds like a lot…Yet every year those minutes become more precious and fleeting. I wonder how many of those precious minutes I spent worrying about a situations that never came to pass, finances, my kids, my parents, my work…Time is marching by daily…never stopping to wait for me.

As the words to the song continued to play…I found myself smiling… I asked myself how you, Carla, measure a year. Here is my version of …”Season’s of Life”… In daylights, in sunsets, in laughter, in tears, in friendships, in touches, in hugs, in kisses, in kindness, in prayers, in gratitude, in service, in teaching, in learning…Every minute of every day can be filled with non essentials, like worry, fear, loneliness, anxiety and feeling overwhelmed.

As women we center our universe around our children, spouses, and employers; providing constant care and nurturing everyone except ourselves. By the end of the day, week, month and year there is no more energy to expend on ourselves. We are exhausted, frustrated, angry, resentful and weighed down..

Ladies…this is no way to live the measure of your creation. There is no shame in nurturing yourself. You cannot fully love another until you fall in love with yourself. Start today by taking the time you need to understand who you are, what you need and how you plan to embrace and make use of your 525,600 minutes…

The reality is, THERE ARE NO ROLL OVER MINUTES.

Live with intensity and purpose.
Carla

God Listens.....

2009-07-28T20:15:00.000-07:00

I read this short story Monday...and LOVED IT! If you are single and wondering IF GOD does LiStEn...have the FAITH to read this true story...

God Listens

"God, if you ever want a man in my life, you will have to put him there. In fact, he will have to be standing at my front door wearing a T-shirt that says you sent him." Those words, spoken from bitterness and disappointment for the crushed relationships in my life, stated exactly how I felt about men, as a single mother.

Years passed, and my busy life centered around church, my four sons and my job. My parents lived out of state, so our church became our family.

Slowly, I turned all my joys, heartaches and triumphs over to God.

During those healing years, my youngest son established a friendship with a man who assisted our youth music minister. Dean was a quiet, somber man, but one who lived a life modeled after our Lord. He urged youth to find their identity through God's unfailing love. I admired Dean's patience, understanding and giving ways. More so, I appreciated his friendship with my sons.

At first, I felt suspicious of him spending time and effort on them, and I researched his background to ensure my sons' safety and well-being. He received glowing reports for his integrity and devotion to God. I decided he had been sent to fill the void in my sons' lives and to be the role model they so desperately needed.

Over the next year and a half, Dean spent more and more time with them. He took the youngest to Cancún during Christmas break and took two of them to Branson, Missouri, shortly afterwards. He purchased one of the boys a car so he could take a part-time job. Dean showed him how to pay for gas and insurance and still have spending money. He listened to my sons' escapades and problems, and he never judged or condemned their behavior. He and I were great friends. I felt no threat, because Dean was twelve years younger than I.

One summer day, the doorbell rang. Dean stood in the doorway wearing a T-shirt with the logo "God Listens." At that moment I remembered the words I had uttered years before. I felt the color rise to my cheeks, and my stomach knotted. Dean handed me five additional shirts with the same "God Listens" logo printed on the front.

"I got these at the Christian bookstore, and there's one for each of you," he said.

All I could think was, "Oh no, Lord, not Dean. He's not the right one. He's too young, and he's - well, he's my friend." Naturally, I said nothing, but thereafter the "God Listens" logo haunted me. I attempted to rationalize the entire incident, and I asked God to handle the matter for me. He did.

Two months later, Dean proposed. The boys were excited, and I realized how happy our lives had become since he first began a relationship with us. Still, I felt nervous and fearful of being hurt again.

Dean and I talked a great deal about a Christian marriage and the value of open communication. We made a budget, attended premarital classes, prayed together and talked about our future.

Neither of us had family nearby, so my sons and a few close friends were all we wanted to attend the ceremony. We scheduled the wedding for ten o'clock on a November morning. Shortly before 9:30, the boys and I drove to the church where one of Dean's friends waited outside to video the whole thing. I'm not very comfortable in front of a camera, but I tried to relax and act normal―whatever that is.

Once inside, I stared amazed at the number of friends who had come to share in our vows. My best friend, my sons and I stood in an empty office while a photographer snapped various poses of us. Of course, the video rolled on.

Promptly at ten, the pastor stepped in and announced it was time for the wedding. We walked down the hallway to find even more friends waiting.

But Dean did not stand among them.

The pastor reached inside his suit pocket and produced a folded piece of paper. "Dean could not be with us this morning, but he did leave a letter for DiAnn."

A hush fell over the room, and I teetered between hysterics and sheer bewilderment. Why couldn't the pastor have pulled me aside to break the news? My heart pounded furiously as I stood there in total humiliation and disappointment. Too stunned to even utter a protest, I watched in horror while the pastor unfolded the letter. Suddenly, the thought of fainting held merit. If only I could stop him - but it was too late.

With heartfelt words, Dean began his letter explaining how he had gradually fallen in love with each member of my family. He stated how his friendship with me had grown from admiration to a deep love. His first love was Jesus, and he knew I shared the same feelings. Together we would establish a loving, Christian marriage and realize the blessings of our Lord. His love and commitment extended to my sons as well.

The letter concluded that he waited for us at a secret destination. There, he awaited me at the altar.

The pastor tucked the letter back inside his suit coat and escorted me to a church bus. I didn't know what to say for fear the lump in my throat would explode into a pool of tears. Where could Dean be?

We boarded a church bus, with the video still filming my every emotion, while I searched futilely for a possible wedding location. Each time I thought I knew where Dean intended to meet me, the bus drove right on by. We continued driving, and my mind raced with the possibilities. Then the bus turned into a lovely subdivision. There stood my husband-to-be in front of a beautiful and spacious new home. In the front yard, a sign leaned against a huge pine tree. It read: The Mills Residence, established November 24, 1993.

Inside, in the dining room, I found a wedding cake and food for all our friends. Candles and baskets of pink flowers surrounded a kneeling bench in front of a marble fireplace. Dean stood there, arms outstretched. A black grand piano filled the room with the music of love.

Dean's T-shirt had been right―God does listen!

I know God not only listens....he is cheering us on everyday...closer to the true desires of our hearts!

Carla

Renewal and Thanks.

2009-07-14T12:14:00.000-07:00

Ethan returned home Sunday evening from a week vacationing around Southern California with the Kurtz Family. Going to California, Disneyland, Sea World and the beach was just what Ethan needed. What Ethan got, was a week to evaluate the importance of family, communication and his life goals. What he experienced was a week with a family he loves, adores and treasures. Each member of the Kurtz family holds a special place in Ethan's ever expanding heart. Each day brought new experiences and memories Ethan will hold dear. The evening brought down time, time to really get to know one another through life histories, laughter, and tears. What Ethan learned was friends are more alike than different, age is only a number, friendships are the reward for taking chances with those we don't know.

Ethan and I hit a little rough patch prior to his leaving. After having a week away both of us had a chance to revisit the situation, words that were spoken and the feelings of frustration we both harbored. I found myself really taking inventory of my relationship with Ethan. I found I really missed his companionship, his great sense of humor, our late night conversations on life, love, relationships, the daily news, friends, spiritual topics, my daily hugs and kisses, the daily text messages and updates on face book. I paused long enough to feel his absence and renew my commitment to breathe, enjoy the ride, live in the moment and let the non essentials go.. Its so easy to get caught up in heated and frustrated moments. Easier to loose my temper, easiest to speak words that are angry, words that encourage silence, distance and hurt.

As we sat on the couch...Ethan shared his experiences with Marty, Stephanie, Jennifer, Haley, Kayla and Zach. Many times there were no words to express his love and appreciation for the Kurtz Family, only tears. He mentioned one late night conversation with Stephanie in particular, (I met Marty and Stephanie when Stephanie's mother passed away). As the conversation turned towards the night before Ethan left...Stephanie assured Ethan that relationships between parents and children are difficult and strained at times, but in the same breath she told Ethan about regrets....regrets of childish selfish behavior towards her mom at times. What she wouldn't give to go back to those hard times and make them right...and how desperately she missed her mother. In a precious teaching moment she helped my son understand another perspective. The dangers of taking those we love for granted and more important life is to short, unpredictable and fragile to spend time being resentful.. As Ethan spoke the tears continued free falling, he expressed his love and appreciation for me, my example and my courage. I have tried unsuccessfully to express my thoughts and feelings here tonight....What I can express is....I wouldn't trade my days of raising my kids for ANYTHING. I have been present and accounted for through out their lives, I have prayed with my kids, kissed hurts, wiped tears away, bought prom dresses, wedding dresses, rented tuxedos, fixed breakfast after Homecoming dances, taught them how to drive the car, provided a loving home that smells like cloves and cinnamon...taught them to love each other, to serve others, to believe in miracles, to exercise kindness.......the greatest blessing in my life raising my children. Then Ethan expressed his desire to be a fabulous future husband and father it again brought tears to my eyes..

As I share this experience with you...my heart if full....actually overflowing... I give thanks for everything, everyone and every moment I have had raising my children. There have been many difficult moments, more exhilarating moments...but I have stayed the course. I have grown into Motherhood...and learned to love the ride.

Marty and Stephanie...even I am at a loss to express my love and profound gratitude for your righteous influence, the sacred trust which has been created, the unconditional love and constant encouragement you show Ethan. You may never know the seeds you have planted...and the bountiful harvest that is to come....Ethan's perspective has been renewed and opened to the realm of possibilities..

Love you..

Carla

How Great is the Worth of One Soul?

2009-07-06T19:40:00.000-07:00

The passing of Michael Jackson continues to be news worthy in every mode of communication possible. Twitter, Internet, Face Book, My Space, TV, Radio, I-Tunes and daily conversations at home, work, with friends, at lunch..where ever....Michael Jackson's influence spans over 30 years, his trademark white sequined glove, white socks and million dollar smile can be seen and heard everywhere. His death as affected each of us...

Michael Jackson is one person who decided early in life to discover and develop his God given talents to entertain and create music. His lyrics proclaim love, charity, change and a world of hope, his music timeless. Feel good, foot tapping, finger snapping melodies that you can't stop til you've had enough...for most of us...there is never enough ~Thriller~, Billy Jean~, Man in the Mirror~Beat It~, Rock with you,~ and on and on.... He was one person who made a huge difference in all of our lives. He lived big...his death tragic....his memory will be timeless.

My name is Carla Mannes, although I will never entertain millions with music and dance, my influence will be carried down through generations of family and time which is priceless. I am a single mother of (4) two boys, two girls....I am one person who has made a conscious choice to discover and develop my God given gifts and talents. My relationship with my Savior has also experienced ups, downs, periods of closeness and periods of separation. Yet he walks along side of me daily to cheer me on...lift me when my spirits are blue, comfort me when I feel overwhelmed, forgotten and lost, he loves me perfectly. He knows me intimately...he has created my strengths, hand picked my weaknesses and understands how great the worth of my soul. He has blessed me with the ability to provide financially, spiritually, emotionally for my children. He has blessed with an enormous book of remembrance...treasured teaching moments, one on one time with each of my children, many late night conversations, first dates, first dances, first loves....lots of hugs, loves, tears, laughter, joy...every emotion possible to feel and experience. I have succeeded....with my children.....and I have accomplished this largely on my own....

My influence is felt today in my 4 absolutely amazing children. As the years passed I have grown to treasure and cherish my experiences as a single mom. After years of questioning myself, wondering if I really did measure up, was I strong enough to survive, feeling much judgement from many....I am confident it saying.... Christopher Robin was right...

You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. - Christopher Robin to Pooh

Not only have I survived...I have flourished...I took a truck load of lemons and made gallons of lemonade...I have laughed much, cried more and have learned to embrace life, and love who I am...I am courageous, I am strong and I am super smart.... I look at each of my children who are loving, kind, compassionate, driven, intelligent, witty, clever, intentional, self made, honest and dedicated to making their world a better place. My influence in their lives runs deep and is far reaching. I am first a mom, second a spiritual leader in my home, a friend, a confidant, a cheerleader, a tutor, a nurse, a short order cook, a decorator, chauffeur, event planner a mother who loves each of her children unconditionally, is open to learning new things, forgiving, kind, compassionate, driven and intentional.

As I have pondered (D&C 18:10, 15–16). "The worth of souls is great in the sight of God. …

“And if it so be that you should labor all your days in crying repentance unto this people, and bring, save it be one soul unto me, how great shall be your joy with him in the kingdom of my Father!

“And now, if your joy will be great with one soul that you have brought unto me into the kingdom of my Father, how great will be your joy if you should bring many souls unto me!”

Our Father in Heaven gets...how great each of us are...individually and collectively....He has sent each of us down here with a specific mission and time frame. Each of us is famous in our own right...each of us is creating a life story, posterity and history that we will ultimately leave behind to those who carry on our names. Our influence and examples are timeless and eternal. Each of us is responsible to write our own chapter....revise what isn't working....re-write and try to perfect our characters and more importantly our souls. It is impossible to assist anyone along our path who is in need of help, if we can't make the time to improve ourselves.

I believe we are all braver than we think, stronger than we seem and smarter than we think individually and collectively.

I express my profound gratitude for understanding my role and place in my Father's kingdom. My wish....for each of us to take the time to be a lot kinder, more patient, more giving, more understanding, more loving...bring more of our brothers and sisters to understand their role in this eternal quest....individually and collectively...there is strength in the number 1.....

Carla

My Thought List...

2009-07-03T22:41:00.000-07:00

I have always had a love and passion for ~Great Thoughts~. I find myself frequenting a couple web sites that are filled with inspiring, exhilarating, stimulating and encouraging thoughts, quotes and sayings.

Most of the contributors are or were ordinary people with extraordinary vision, determination and chutzpah. The one common denominator in those who think and live positively is they live by faith...not fear....They are willing to pay the price of failure to experience the thrill of winning, succeeding and crossing the finish line. Ordinary human beings who in the twinkling of an eye transform fear into courage and muster the strength complete the task required. Persistence prevails when all else fails.

I am fortunate, my nature is tenacious and persistent. I have spent the last 5 years working diligently on become reacquainted with myself. Marriage, children, career and divorce have a way of changing one's perception. I have come to accept that no one is responsible for my happiness or fulfillment...only me. Which has turned out to be one of my greatest blessings...not always easy or comfortable but no one can walk in my shoes but me. Learning to accept and love myself has been key in my healing,. One of highlights from my road less traveled has been developing a love of reading material that is high energy, spiritual and inspiring on a daily basis. I have come to understand this is ~Soul Food~ for me. I will share just a few of my favorite thoughts....Read with care....be open to gratitude, change and personal inspiration. My hope is you too will seek out of the best thoughts daily for a little inspiration. My dad has always told me ~Rome wasn't built in a day...and it didn't burn over night....~ translated...means....change is a one step at a time process, you can't possibly do it all right now, nor would you really want to. Get to know who you are, how you feel and what inspires you.

“Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest” - Mark Twain

You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. - Christopher Robin to Pooh

“This is my wish for you: Comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, Love to complete your life.”

If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves. Thomas A. Edison

Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions. Albert Einstein

"Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares." Hebrews 13:2

You must be the change you wish to see in the world." Mahatma Gandhi

“Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” Thomas Edison

Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be - Abraham Lincoln

Some have the bucket list....I will continue to grow My ~Thought List~....I would love to hear your thoughts....

Carla

Passages...

2009-06-28T20:17:00.000-07:00

I work in the Funeral Industry, I experience death, tragedy and grief on a daily basis. I witness the best and worst of family dynamics, parents, children and siblings who are estranged, many pass from this life literally alone. This week brought death into view for most as Farrah Fawcett lost her battle with cancer and Michael Jackson's life came to an abrupt end. We mark their passing with TV tributes, stories, twitting, face book comments, text messaging and conversation between each other. Michael Jackson's death brought the Internet to a stand still as millions were trying to come to terms with his passing. A world left in shock to think the King of Pop as we knew him had experienced death. Many have shared stories of his unhappy, unfulfilled life and miserable life. Others have paid tribute to his phenomenal musical talent, his profound influence on pop culture and how he crossed the color barrier with his music.

Passages are transitions and change in our lives. Each of us will experience many passages in life until we ultimately graduate from ~Earth School~ and have earned our wings. I have been reflecting on the many passages in my life, the lives of my parents, my siblings and my children. Last night as I was coming home from the grocery shopping, Griffin and Jackie were waiting in the drive way. They came out to have dinner and chat. A passage.....there is a time in ones life where friends are less important and the relationships with parents and siblings become paramount. We enjoyed the nicest visit. We reminisced about Griffin's younger years....talked about his work which he loves and he and Jackie talked about their future plans. I took in every minute. As I looked at my son, I was humbled at the man he has become. I am blessed to have had a small part of his upbringing. I have told Griffin from the time he was little I believe he has the ability to change the world. Griffin is very intentional, intellectual, loving, passionate, kind and resourceful. He will make is mark in science and music. Jackie is a wonderful companion for him. He is at peace in his life...he feels joy and accomplishment...

Kylie returned from a week at the beach...she called me Friday night to talk...she was not feeling well, a little bit home sick and definitely ready to come home. My heart smile as I looked back over Kylie's life. There has been so much growth as she has developed her talents. Kylie is beautiful, her physical beauty parallels her spiritual beauty. She will leave her mark caring and serving others. She is spiritual, influential, intentional and driven. As she returned home, there was a change, she returned as a confident young woman who is sure of her direction in love and life. It's amazing what time away from those you love can teach you...if your heart is open. I ran into Kylie and Evan on their way out the door.. it was clear....there had been a passage....a greater appreciation, love and commitment between the two. The future feels good and Kylie slept well.

Ethan is going to start the last year of his high school career...another passage.....12 years of personal growth, learning experiences both positive and painful, learning to ride a bike, to driving a car, learning how to choose good friends, dating, dances and coming into his own. Ethan is very much like Griffin when it comes to being very intentional, driven, confident and successful...Ethan also has the ability to change the world...Ethan will make his mark in music and creating a world wide service organization....He is very humanitarian....which makes me smile.

I looked at old pictures of Cori. Its funny to think there is another human being that looks so much like me...She is so talented, outgoing and just plain fun to be around. Cori is the ultimate hostess, excellent cook and entertainer. She is hardworking, determined and successful. Cori has always looked for the road less traveled. She has never been interested in being like everyone else, she has always made her own way. Cori picks herself up after a fall, as grown into a beautiful, talented woman and wife. Cori and Brett share a wonderful companionship and deep love...Cori and Brett suffered a miscarriage earlier this year...not a set back....just a passage...their time is coming and Cori will transition from young woman to young mother....

My life has been almost story book...there are those chapters that need revising...family relationships aren't always easy or attainable. One of the challenges we all face.. When I go back and revisit the early chapters of my life with my own children I clearly see my passage...young mother, single mother and successful mother....The hard lessons are my most treasured. As my children have grown into adults I have come to understand the scope of my role as their mother. I smile when I see the passage of the last 11 years as a single mom. Not only have I survived, I have healed my heart, healed the fractures in the communication with my kids, and I feel accomplished, respected, supported and loved by so many. I have been blessed with health, strength and a strong testimony of my beliefs, I have come to understand compassion, tolerance and patience..I have learned what it feels like to be nice, instead of worrying about having to be right.

Passages are amazing times in our lives....not only does a passage signify the important events in our lives, more importantly a passage is the route or course by which a person or thing passes or travels....

"I expect to pass through this world but once: if therefore, there be any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do, let me do it now; let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again."

William Ashmead Courtenay

Carla

Character, Communication and the Beach...

2009-06-24T20:41:00.000-07:00

I had a chance phone call Tuesday afternoon, not only did this call take me completely by surprise I found myself evaluating my feelings on character, communication, acceptance, love and understanding. The call was from Evan....Evan and Kylie have been dating since January. I found myself at times feeling very closed off and even distant from wanting to really get to know Evan. Like every relationship there have been ups, downs, tears, laughter, planning, talking about the future and spending time really getting to know each other. As a mother of a beautiful young daughter my hope, dream and wish for her has always been to find her prince charming, the man of her dreams that will help her fill the measure of her creation.

This past week has been filled with tears, frustrations, relationship fears and physical distance between Kylie and Evan. The decisions that face these two are life changing, scary and exciting all at the same time. I have shared of my concerns with both of them as I have watched their relationship grow and evolve.

I was simply not prepared to have Evan call me, dig deep into the recesses of his heart, share his deepest feelings, thoughts and plans for the future with Kylie which was no easy conversation to have with me. Yet there we were....having a very poignant and emotional conversation. As I was listening very intently I also placed myself in his shoes. The depth of my feelings was overwhelming. The tears were free falling as I listened to him. I came to understand in one precious moment just how much we both love Kylie.

I was so touched by Evan's sincerity and courage. I am humbled by his gracious nature, his willingness to look past my many weaknesses and imperfections without judgment. Our conversation as raw and truthful as it was....has created a trust and respect on all sides while opening the door to greater communication, understanding, acceptance and love.

I am grateful for the tender mercies of my Savior. His willingness to always stand in the gap for me, even when I can't muster the faith or strength to stand on my own. I am grateful for continued opportunities to stretch, grow and work to develop Christ like attributes...like grace, compassion, wisdom, patience, gratitude, long suffering, forgiveness, unconditional love and service which at times feel uncomfortable and most difficult for me to embrace...A fact of my mortality, yet I am so grateful to see and feel his presence around me daily through the goodness of humanity that each of us possess. Random acts of love, kindness, charity, compassion and tenderness that are within my reach every day....He is there cheering me on...supporting me and sustaining me even when life's finish line seems well outside of my reach.

Its amazing how much you can learn when your daughter is at the beach....you answer your phone....and you are willing to see another in a pure light....a light that allowed his character to shine through. Thank you Evan...proof positive....you can teach an old yet cosmopolitan dog new tricks....

Sweet dreams Prince Evan....and somewhere close to the beach is his princess.....

I love you both...

Mom

Keeping your options open.....

2009-06-16T22:13:00.000-07:00

Tonight Kylie and I met up with my Mom and Patty Jones at Golden Spoon for a frozen yogurt. They had just finished getting nails and toes done. My mom is very persnickety about keeping her nails and toes in tip top condition. She was thrilled to see Kylie and I, the four of us sat down in the middle of ciaos to enjoy a yogurt and great conversation being lead by a great teacher.

My mom's motto has always be preparedness. She never thought twice about stocking up on towels, underwear, luggage, books, candles, tweezers, magnifying mirrors....and of course movie size boxes of DOTS. As the conversation turned towards Kylie and her seriously dating Evan, my mom decided it was time to stop and focus on getting Kylie a ~Hope Chest~. I'm not sure about you....but I gave up any hope for my chest years ago...and Kylie was feeling a lot the same tonight. With three older and much wiser women sitting around Kylie we all decided what she really needed tonight was sage advice, documented with real life dating experiences. Each of us stepped up to the mic and shared what we felt were profound experiences of love, dating and marriage. Our laughter over took Golden Spoon. Grama Mannes in her profound wisdom told Kylie what she really needed was to pick out some towels...whatever color she wanted and they would be monogramed. Grama said...Let's have your initials KS (Kylie Schmidt) put on the towels...and go ahead and leave your options open for the time being, we can always have his initials put on later.....The four of us laughed so hard we cried....Just like my mom....she always begins with the end in mind....

Just like my mom...always keeping her options open and teaching yet another profound life lesson over a frozen yogurt. Isn't' that what life is really all about...Learning to keep your options open....or maybe even open to the realm of possibilities. I've experienced first hand just how magical life can be....just how smooth the rough spots can get and when you least expect it....the answer to a prayer, the confirmation of your decision, your knowing you are on the right path, its like the universe is conspiring for you, with you, in your favor...it's the planets aligning perfectly, the tide knowing when its time to come in, it's your life unfolding just the way it is suppose to.

I treasure those moments when I am called upon to teach, guide, listen and offer up my perspective with my children. I believe those are called ~Kodak Moments~...those tender experiences that draw us closer as individuals and more importantly families. As a single mother I can honestly say....I have become a professional at keeping my options open. I've learned that love does truly conquer all, forgiveness is a gift, the best things in life are free, great music can change your mood, Sonic Happy Hour is a spiritual experience, Jack in the Box will do in a pinch, there are no strangers among us...just friends we haven't met, the right job always materializes ..I am constantly learning, growing and evolving, my door is always open, there is nothing better than late night conversations with my kids, money can never by happiness, chips and salsa are a start for world peace....Faith always wins....kindness cures the blues, walking a mile in someone else's shoes usually gives way to huge blisters, first impression are usually wrong, you never know anyone until you've had the opportunity to be in their home...

Tonight I am right with my mom....The scenic view of life is breathtaking....when you decide its worth keeping your options open.

Carla

A Monday that feels like Friday....

2009-06-15T18:21:00.000-07:00

You know its a good day on a Monday, when you roll out of bed early with no alarm, are having the almost perfect hair day (prior to ANY COMB being run through your hair), its 73 degrees at 5:45 am in the middle of June, I assembled the perfect wardrobe and accessories in under 15 minutes (a new world record and personal best time for me) and felt completely put together as I was rushing out the door. I have come to RELISH Fridays and almost despise Mondays....However I decided to experiment this week. My Friday was the BOMB....dinner at Joe's BBQ with my gal pals....great ~Chick~ conversation, mild flirting going on with those patiently waiting in the order here line. I thought my luck was about to change when this tall, dark and devastatingly handsome man smiled and asked me....What I would recommend off the menu....Of course my thoughts immediately turned to....PICK ME....

Alison, Becky and I were laughing so hard....it was impossible to properly answer this handsome man....So I invited him to sit down next to me....and as the story were to play out....He told us he had just finished tubing down the Salt River....and his entire family were at Joe's...for the first time....I suggested ....let's see...I can't remember ...but then when we started talking about work....I told him the three of us amigos worked in a Funeral Home...He smiled and said he was very familiar with our line of work and often lent a hand where and when he could....Then the truth came out as I probed further to see what part of the valley he lived in...He smiled and said he was visiting from Indiana...and that he was a Pastor....(Gulp.....I saw my life pass before me...mildly flirting with a man of the cloth.. BTW Just my Luck....or Not) so we laughed even harder....

Then comes Monday....the day that signifies putting the week end behind and starting all over again....grinding out the 40 hours needed to equal another full week....with the carrot being another Friday only 5 days away.

I decided this morning as the usually mundane details of my morning routine were so easily falling into place...Why Not Think and Feel Friday....even on a Monday....so I did and I am happy to report my day was amazing...

My Funeral Service was perfect, I was told I exceeded the expectations of my family....which made me smile....I received many hugs and a kiss for my service rendered....The cemetery was gorgeous...a light breeze, unbelievably beautiful, the dove release was the high light....The eternal contrast of the white doves against the blue sky gave everyone a reason to stop and give pause for their extraordinary beauty and grace.

I felt such gratitude for my team as were able to help this family during their grief.

A Monday that feels like a Friday is nothing short of miraculous....But then again....isn't that how life is.....

Carla

Inspiration.....

2009-06-12T21:59:00.000-07:00

stimulating influence upon the intellect or emotions of others. I had the great opportunity to have dinner with two women I really admire tonight. The three of us are very different personality wise, yet together we are energy, powerful, intentional, gifted, supportive and inspirational. Our circumstances are similar yet very different. We share a common understanding of spiritual and divine teachings. We are mothers who love our children and want only the best for each of them. We are women of strong conviction, we each embrace the fact we can band together to improve our neighborhoods and communities. We understand where we have come from, why we are here on earth and where are journey will ultimately take us.

Not one of us envisioned the adversity and challenges that would be strewn along our path. Nor could we have possibly experienced the personal growth, change and strength that would be our constant companion. I love the quote...~Life isn't about surviving the storm, it's learning how to dance in the rain~. My greatest challenges have also facilitated the greatest growth and understanding of myself. Learning to like yourself not only takes practice....it requires courage. At times it may seem easier to think of ourselves as others do...or to place damaging labels on our self worth. That would feel like the path of least resistance....allowing ourselves to wallow...and to become common place.

The road less traveled requires courage, conviction, perseverance and the ability to keep moving upward. We choose to live in the realm of possibility seeing the world as our oyster. We choose to change limiting behaviors, eliminate defeating self talk, leaving behind destructive relationships. I choose to surround myself with those who seek enlightenment, embrace personal change, welcome new perspectives, understand the power of love, charity and kindness.

On my journey I have been guided, blessed and lead to many of these great women whom I call my friends. True friendship is a powerful and loving force.

Tonight as we talked about many things there was time for laughter, making new friends along the way, discussing good books, enjoying a great dinner...and what a brainstorming session.... I came home inspired, uplifted and ready to embark on a life long dream. We all left feeling inspired..

Thank you Alison and Becky.....I am most fortunate to have made your acquaintance on the Road Less Traveled.....

Celebrations....

2009-06-07T21:40:00.000-07:00

Today we gathered as family and friends to help Marty K celebrate his birthday. It was an afternoon filled with family, friends, great food, great conversations poolside, a ping pong tournament, great music, birthday candles, presents, cake, amazing cheesecake...(from the Cheesecake Factory), singing, blowing out candles, laughing and counting blessings.

I was glad Ethan, Kylie, Evan and I were invited and able to attend. As I watched everyone interacting, talking, discussing, sharing advice, stories from the past and taking in a gorgeous Sunday afternoon...I realized how symbolic celebrations are..There are a couple of main ingredients that make celebrations grand. 1). A great guest list. 2). The perfect location (poolside in this case). 3). A fabulous menu (Marty K never skimps on the food). 4). A location (like the Kurtz home) that is warm, inviting, welcoming and no one ever wants to leave.

As I was coming home tonight I was reflecting on how much I love to celebrate! There are so many opportunities in our day to stop, pause, reflect and enjoy the numerous reasons to celebrate. I love the joyous occasions of success, triumph, accomplishment....which can translate into....the perfect day, a great compliment, a birthday, an engagement, a marriage, an anniversary, having a baby, a new house, new job, overcoming a personal obstacle, the perfect weight, entertaining in my home, oh Henry bars, Pico De Gallo, the holidays, a feeling of inner peace, mending a relationship fence, enjoying the perfect evening in the desert, a beautiful sunset, a thunderstorm, a hallmark card, that surprise phone call, a hot shower, finding the perfect accessories, a great book, sleeping in, popcorn, a clean car, the feeling of rain on my face, perfectly painted finger nails, dinner at a new restaurant, music from the 70's, taking a personal inventory of all that is good, blessings received, prayers that have been answered, knowing my Heavenly Father loves me, the whisperings of the spirit, having faith to know the whys will be explained at a later date, understanding opposition can be your friend, a hug, a touch and knowing I belong.

I am grateful for the ties that bind my family, my dear friends and my beliefs. Much like Clarence there isn't a day that goes by that every time I hear a bell ring, I know that a sweet angel has received their wings.

There is always a celebration in full swing....

Thank you again....Kurtz Family.....

Word Power.....

2009-06-04T18:22:00.000-07:00

Kylie picked me up from work today and as we were driving home she said...Mom you really need to read Emily's blog...she was blogging about you. I sat down to read her sweet post. Emily is darling....it's been nearly a month since she and Brett were married. They decided to embark on a grand adventure this summer working in North Carolina. Emily is amazing she not only has a million dollar smile....but personality plus....sales is right up her alley. She is working a very demanding and difficult sales job, not to mention being away from home, trying to settle a new home with a new husband...many new and exciting changes....but she is working with PEOPLE.....easy to understand how that in itself could get you down. Nothing can ruin a neighborhood faster than neighbors...to quote my good friend Dan Boyum...(Boone)

I started thinking about my own week at home, work, with family, with friends.....then I thought about how easy it is to have one negative thought start a cascade of self doubt. Words are the basis of our communication. Without words communication would be very challenging. We are constantly thinking...our minds never shut off....we may feel the need to re boot at times but essentially we are thinking 24/7/365....so what do you think about? what words do you use?

I would love to share some of my favorite words...Love, Gratitude, Faith, Hope, Charity, Compassion, Inspire, Passion, Joy, Wisdom, Bliss, Happiness, Accomplishment, Peace, Tranquil, Confidence, Spontaneous, Humor, Wit, Charming, Self-made, Secure, Knowledgeable, Nobility...

Some of my favorite sayings.....

1. Bless Your Heart.
2. You must be the Change you wish to see in the World.
3. Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain.
4. You have on the Ruby Red Slippers..
5. You have the ability to change the world.
6. Thoughts become things.
7. Be intentional.
8. Count your many blessings.
9. Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. Hebrews 13:2
10. Merry Christmas!
11. Sweet Dreams!
12. Pixie Dust makes everything just a little bit better.
13. Eyes are the windows to your soul.
14. Play full on.
15. Embrace life, love and your passion.

As I am typing these very meaningful words, thoughts and phrases I am invigorated, inspired and feel as though I just climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro. It's amazing how we have the ability to control and change our thoughts at anytime.

We all have MOMENTS.....sometimes DAYS....and even YEARS...that are hard and seem unbearable. Keep in mind...Words are power...words that uplift and inspire can and will also slay those negative dragons that love to deflate our dreams. Each of us has a mission to complete and time frame in which to accomplish our dreams.

I am listening to my wind chimes...which by the way are blowing and chiming in the breeze tonight....Makes me feel......Fabulous....love to hear those chime....Music is also a very powerful way to change your mood....instantaneously ...Uplifting music that resonates within our hearts...and a great Book....and yes for me....Twilight makes me feel instantly better...(yes I am a huge Fan-Pire.....)

Emmy...I know you are along way from home....which is only distance.....Love knows no distance.. Don't be discouraged...you are where you need to be, doing what you need to be doing...and your husband is right by your side.

Make a list of Power Words.....Use them daily...and when those little negative thoughts try to make their way in.....hold up your STOP sign and STOP what your thinking....and bring into play your power words....it's amazing how quickly everything will turn around.

Treasure those heartfelt moments, cherish the new experiences and relish the sweet memories you are creating...

I love you back.....and big....

Mama Carla

Life's little treasures....

2009-06-03T20:34:00.000-07:00

I am sitting down composing my thoughts and feeling almost giddy.....I had a simply amazing day. I started to reflect on the little treasures that continually make my life so grand...What surprised me was how many new treasures I am constantly adding to my treasure chest...When I think of my greatest treasures, my children are front and center. Seriously they are each amazing in their own right, all are great conversationalist, each are interesting, knowledgeable across the board, opinionated (yes they all take after me!), fearlessly running after their dreams, each blessed with compassion, humor and charity. Each willing to serve their family, friends and in their communities. Its so rewarding to see them each succeed and exhilarating to be able to experience their victories with them....Its humbling to share every aspect of their lives.

Another little treasure is taking time to STOP and count my blessings. Sitting out in the sun, enjoying a moment in bookstore, Starbucks with Ethan, Golden Spoon with Kylie...Sushi with Griffin, Taco Johns with Brett and Cori....The feeling of my freshly fluffed feather bed and pillows... NICE....watching Twilight, reading a great book, teaching my Sunday School class, great friends, breakfast at Crackers, the perfect evening, stars, Sonic ice, the smell of jasmine, good health, a perfect hair day, phone call from a good friend who is traveling through Windom, Minnesota, finding the perfect pair of reading glasses, great fingernails...the perfect red nail polish, a pedicure, a crush, hallmark cards, living in the moment and with passion..and the list goes on...

I love the quote ~" Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."~

One of my greatest treasures is feeling happiness, joy, the sense of great accomplishment in my life. Being at peace with myself and learning to dance in the rain.

Next time you see feel the skies darken, the winds start to blow and the storm is raging....grab your dance partner and start dancing like you mean it and you will find the silver lining that awaits you on the other side.

Take an inventory of your little treasures tonight....you will be astonished how blessed your life is.....

Infinite blessings ....

Sweet dreams....

Carla

A lesson in Wisdom....

2009-05-23T21:56:00.000-07:00

Friday morning Ethan had all 4 of his ~Wisdom~ teeth out. Prior to taking our seats in the dreaded waiting room, we were laughing almost to the point of tears...As we walked into Dr. Porters office a young woman who had just completed her procedure was escorted to her mother's car with gauze streaming out of her mouth...yet in a very humorous moment turned to give Ethan a big thumbs up as if to say...if I can survive this procedure so can you!.......we found humor in that very moment. So much so the entire office was laughing with us.

As we were waiting for his turn, we discussed in depth how silly is was to call these menacing teeth ~Wisdom Teeth~...what wisdom could or did they bring. The more Ethan argued his case the more I thought about Wisdom and the life lessons that help each of us in developing Wisdom in this life. As we talked...Ethan was more focused on the upcoming events of first laughing gas, needles, large gaping holes in the back of his mouth...I assured him...all would be well and the pain short lived.

Wednesday started as any other day...Early to rise, showers, breakfast, watching Cash Cab, dressing then out the door to school and work. Ethan woke up that morning concerned about a lingering soar throat and just feeling a bit under the weather. As the day progressed he felt worse. When he came to pick up my car at 3:30 he was running a slight fever but was still heading to work. I attended Emily Lewis and Brett Randall's wedding reception...GORGEOUS..and my word for the Newly wed Randall's is HOLLER! As I was driving home Ethan called me and told me he had come home early from work...Really not feeling well.

He jumped in the shower and I got some cold medicine ready for him. I heard him talking on the phone but didn't know who he was talking to. Ethan told me he had called the Bishop and asked him if he would come over and give him a blessing. What an amazing experience his blessing was for all of us. Much of the blessing spoke of the Stripling Warriors and the precision and exactness in which they learned and were taught obedience and to listen to their Mothers. Ethan was told his Heavenly Father loves him dearly and he is watched over constantly...and through his faith and obedience the Lord would heal him. When I think of the adversity of being a single parent....I see the great blessings that have come into my home through a loving Bishop, consistent home teachers and a host of friends who are so dear who live the gospel and set excellent examples for my kids. Wisdom....in knowing the Lord has and will answer the righteous desires of my young son's heart to be healed...so his teeth can come out when scheduled. The Wisdom of a great Bishop who is constantly in touch with Ethan and Kylie understanding how limited family support is. Our dear friends who exercise their Wisdom in knowing its a visit or phone call will make all the difference in our lives that day. Wisdom in knowing we are never alone to face the challenges, heartache and trials that define who we really become...very much like a refiners fire.

I was so thankful for an amazing Bishop who understood that Ethan's request was timely and of the utmost importance to him. Bill Mellyn who is always right there to assist as well. That night as I knelt to express my gratitude..the tears came in complete free fall. The Lord had extended a much needed tender mercy...a miracle of healing....to a 17 year old boy who for the first time pick up the phone to enquire of the Lord through his Bishop.

As I held his hand while Dr. Porter administered the anesthetic and Ethan drifted off to sleep..I embraced the Wisdom I have acquired in past 10 years. What a privilege its been to raise my children. What sweet memories I will always hold dear of telephone calls, school projects, dances, friends, church activities, dates, just day to day living and those heartfelt late night conversations that become most treasured. Wisdom in looking back to see the hand of the Lord with me as a constant companion even when I thought I was alone. Wisdom in understanding the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships and the courage to change those patterns. Wisdom in enjoying the little things that make life so grand. Wisdom in knowing: When the voice and the vision on the inside, become more profound, and more clear and loud, than the opinions on the outside, you’ve mastered your life. — Dr John Demartini

It's amazing how 4 little teeth can have such an impact on our lives, our faith, prayers, gratitude, joy, bliss, unconditional love, communication and experiencing miracles....

When Ethan wakes up and is feeling better I will share with him my lesson in Wisdom.

My cup is overflowing....

Carla

I'm not in Kansas anymore....

2009-05-20T18:07:00.000-07:00

as my plane about blew off the runway as we made a bumpy landing into Sky Harbor late Monday night.....I just returned from spending a long week end with Cori and Brett in Maryville Missouri. We had a great time....talking, laughing, catching up on hugs, kisses and driving around the Albers new community...What a fabulous little town...rolling hills, gorgeous green trees, lush lawns, fragrant lilac bushes...and cute homes. Cori and Brett are settling into a darling home, the perfect home for their family. We spent sometime in their hot tub...which was awesome...you would have thought someone threw a bucket of stars into the sky....on that clear night. I was privileged to experience a Thunderstorm Missouri style....and much cooler weather....More importantly I savored every minute of conversation with Cori. She has grown into a beautiful, confident woman who has extraordinary talents. She puts her talents to work everyday.

I was able to just wind down and enjoy myself.. Its amazing what a few restful days can do to renew one's spirit, clear the cobwebs from ones mind and come home refreshed and ready to accomplish my dreams. I am so grateful for my children. There is no feeling like being close to your children....hugs, kisses, girls day out....we had a blast. I feel rested and at peace knowing the Albers are thriving each and every day. Cori is doing so well. She is getting back into the routine of her busy life and schedule. Brett and Cori are both pretty big deals at their new store. Both have huge responsibilities....they are thriving....

What mother doesn't love her daughter spoiling her by cooking her favorite things...and if she is not cooking a few of mom's favorite things then at least driving her to Taco Johns for a Taco Bravo....Yummy!

I am so very blessed. No doubt about the constant stream of heavenly blessings and tender mercies flowing from above to me and my children. Almost feels like a constant shower of love, peace, good health, humor, forgiveness, acceptance, friendship, great communication and family. All of the ingredients mothers gently fold into their family mix, all tried and tested...

Tonight is Emily Lewis's wedding reception. Kylie is a brides made...I need to get ready to go and see her....

Blessings......(and yes Ben....save me a piece of chicken)

Carla

Heavy Hearts....

2009-05-12T20:45:00.000-07:00

Tonight as I collect my thoughts, I am reminded how quickly life can and does change. Cori called..last Thursday morning, as I answered the call, I knew the instance she said ~Mom~ something was terribly wrong. In a split second I had played out every scary scenario in my mind as to what could be wrong. As she spoke, tears flooded my eyes, rolling down my cheeks splashing to the floor below me. She has lost the baby....I was numb. I could not get my heart let alone my ears around what she was saying to me. We cried together as she recounted the events of the past 7 days. My heart ached for her..Kylie was home with me. She quickly came into my room as she put the pieces of our conversation together. The tears came for all of us. My concern for Cori was not just of her loss, her heart was experiencing pain she had never know. I was also experiencing pain and a loss I had never felt. I was devastated. I was desperate to take this pain from Cori...and I was helpless to do so....What a yucky position to be in.....

As we talked about the events and the outcome of losing the baby, Cori was listing her blessings. Cori and Brett share more than a last name, check book and a postal address. These are two amazing young people who understand the difference between an ordinary marriage and an extraordinary relationship where unconditional love, fidelity and communication are just three of their best traits. They understand the eternal perspective of love, life and family. Brett is so Prince Charming, he never misses an opportunity to express his love and devotion to Cori in word and deed. Cori is first to reciprocate his love and devotion, she also fills his life with so many little extras that make life so grand. They have rallied around each other...they are healing their heavy hearts and planning for their family. I am cheering them on...as are so many. My dear friends who have been such a part of Cori's life, reached out with phone calls and cards. What a blessing to have such a solid and unconditional support system.

As a parent I couldn't be more pleased with the choices of companions my children have made. Sunday evening Griffin and Jackie came over to make dinner. I so enjoy my time with them. I am so proud of the fine man Griffin is. Jackie is precious and has brought a new life to Griffin. Kylie is dating Evan...it's been so fun to watch their relationship blossom. I really appreciate Evan. Ethan is a chick magnate....and a wonderful young man. Its the best...to have great relationships with your kids and know they feel the same in wanting to build their relationships with me.

As we met on Sunday, my cup runneth over....I was smiling as I laid my head down taking an inventory of my amazing blessings. Griffin, Jackie, Cori, Brett, Kylie, Evan, Ethan and his friends. There are always going to be bumps in the road, thunder storms, grey sky's and bouts of adversity....and just on the other side is the rainbow...

Having the courage to walk directly into the path of the storm having the faith to know that just on the other side of that raging storm is a beautiful field of green and calm...and of course the Rainbow.. the constant reminder that God is ever present and more importantly He always keeps his promises.

We no longer feel that heaviness in our hearts. We are excited to see what the future holds. Cori continues to unpack and settle into her new home. She is still working to finish the baby's room. She knows she will blessed with children. She has great faith.

I am leaving for Missouri to spend a very long week end with Cori and Brett. I can't wait to take that little daughter of mine into my arms and give her BIG Loves...and Bigger Squeezes......we always play as we are getting ready to get off the phone...one of us will start with....I LOVE YOU MORE.....Followed by...THAT CAN'T BE I LOVE YOU MORE...this goes on for a couple of minutes...then concludes with I love you the very most.

Cori I am on the way.....keep the light on...see you Thursday.

Mom

Friday May 3, 1985......

2009-05-03T19:47:00.000-07:00

It started as a very normal day...over cast in the Salt Lake Valley actually raining with that spring chill in the air. I was expecting my second baby towards the end of the month. I was feeling tired and very pregnant, what a great day to stay in and curl up with a good book. Then my day took a most interesting turn...contractions started ...my cause for concern was with the intensity and minutes between which my pains came. At the time my husband was a student who was home getting ready to head out the door for his class, it became very apparent as I hung up the phone after talking to my Doctor we were headed for the hospital. Alta View Hospital was about a 25 minute drive as we were living up at the University of Utah...As we went outside to get in the car the rain really started to come down...cold, rainy and dark....and our car would not start...Lucky our friends were home and willing to let us use there car..

Off we went. My thoughts turned to the baby. Within a short period of time I would no longer be pregnant but would be holding a little treasure. As I tried to get comfortable in the car I felt the aches and pains of the flu coming on. Needless to say one of the longer drives in my life. I always felt better maybe even relieved to hear Dr. Hansen's calm reassuring voice...of all would be well. I encountered many complications which hindered my ability to deliver the baby, a very quick decision was made to start the prep for a C-section. I was not feeling well at this time but never felt anxious. I was excellent hands. Once the team had assembled for surgery they wheeled my off. The next thing I recall was the ah's from the team....and Dr. Hansen telling me she was gorgeous, healthy and came equipped with an amazing pair of lungs....

So entered Cori Ellen Schmidt into the world on Friday May 3, 1985. She was beautiful...olive flawless skin with jet black hair....she was amazing. She was born with a couple of minor complications so off to the neonatal nursery she was whisked.

Today we celebrate a milestone of 24 years...of amazing growth, development, personality plus, a contagious laugh and a zest for cooking and life. Cori came into this world almost knowing what her life's mission was. She is strong, yet filled with compassion for others, animals and especially grandmothers. She is willing to step outside her comfort zone to pursue her dreams. She will always be willing to stand for the right and for those who can't stand for themselves. She is a natural born leader...and a wonderful daughter, friend and companion.

When she was visiting last June her and I were walking through Scottsdale Fashion Mall when she suggested we window shop at the Tiffany store. As we walked in she asked the woman behind the counter if we could take a look at the heart bracelets...we laughed and tried on every last one...then in a very unexpected move...she looked at me with tears in her eyes and said..."Mom were are taking this heart bracelet home for you." I was stunned. She quickly looked at the woman helping us and said....she will wear it...here is my card.... She then put her arm around me and said...."Thank you for everything mom...Brett and I love you!" A great moment for me...Thank you Cori...I have yet to take off that precious heart bracelet from you.

I am so blessed. I have enjoy every minute of those 24 years with Cori....some moments hard, some moments we disagreed, some we were at odds...most moments are filled with closeness, caring and love. We have shared many good time, great girl conversations and many great belly laughs.

Cori is on the same path I was on 25 years ago with her. She is starting her own family...there will be a little Albers who will come into this world set on making it a better place. A little soul who will be courageous, strong, filled with compassion, direction and determined to make life all it can be....an extension of my daughter.....

Friday May 3, 1985 was a blessed day.....It was the day Cori came into my life.

Happy Birthday Cork a doo......

WE LOVE YOU!

Mom, Ethan, Ky

Saying Good-Bys...

2009-04-23T20:20:00.000-07:00

Tonight Cori's text was plain and simple. We are all moved out....with a sad blue frowny face. When she called and poured out her heart...I understood what she is feeling, sad about leaving Brett's family and friends, excited about the new adventure and possibilities. Maryville will be a great place for the Albers to call home for the next couple of years. I know Cori and Brett will make the most of their time there, making new friendships, working hard and getting involved in the community. I am so grateful both Cori and Brett are very outgoing...and of course very optimistic...their glass is over flowing .... There is a little spirit who is coming to bless their home...I told Cori....being a mom is the easiest thing....once they hand you that little bundle of joy...you instantly fall in love....all over again....As a mother that connection is life long and deepens with every experience we share with our children. There is something so right with wanting to check in with mom especially when Mom's can make everything so right. It's been so awesome to talk to Cori daily to follow her on this adventure.

Tuesday evening Ethan and I went to meet Griffin and Jackie downtown for dinner and a Diamondback Baseball game. Jackie's dad has 4 of the most amazing seats....5 rows up directly behind the Diamondback dugout at 3rd base....Seriously amazing seats....we had a great time. The evening was beautiful...It was so fun to people watch....and have the time to visit with Griffin and Jackie. We had a great time....

This week has been busy work wise. Hard in one sense as I have worked closely with families I know who have experience great loss. Again....saying Good by is so very hard.... Even with the knowledge of the Gospel, Plan of Salvation (Happiness) and all we have been taught as members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints....Death is the hardest trial of all...In my opinion. Death comes in many ways prolonged sickness, sudden accidents, sudden health problems....each visit brings heartfelt questions to family and friends...Why? Why me? Why us? in light of everything I know and feel....the tears always come and my heat feels for the families I serve. I am so very grateful for the daily opportunity I have to not only acknowledge my numerous blessings but to embrace every minute, hour and day I have on this earth. I am so very blessed with my children and the relationships I have with each one of them. My dear friends who are my family...good health, a great sense of humor (which I also use daily) and an optimistic spirit...My life is always brimming over....

There is something very magical about great girl friends....that small inner circle of friends who really become your sisters.....the girls who unconditionally love, always support, are there to whether the storms of life, inspire, encourage and share an inside story, joke or laugh. I have been so blessed in the Girl Friend Department...Thank you up above!!!

Yes it's true...I do have a facebook page....ok...how fun is facebook? I am in touch with old friends, my kids friends, and family in Utah....it's been great to get caught up....it's so amazing to see the little ones I use to know grow into adults who are developing their gifts and talents and living their lives...and having children....a signal that the years pass quickly...way to fast.

I have never been one for saying good by.....I like to feel that the relationships I hold most dear to me are eternal in nature and lasting.....Leaving behind those you love means only miles...real relationships take root and continue to grow and deepen with time...and in every case distance. Love knows no boundary of distance, miles, days, months years....Love is the greatest gift of all...

Love is eternal....

Sleep well my little one....and take good care of your mommie and daddy.....

Grammy

9 Weeks....with 30 to go.......

2009-04-18T18:07:00.000-07:00

Cori and Brett have so much on their plates right now. Trying to organize moving away from Sioux Falls, moving to Missouri...Leaving their first home....moving into their new home...Many exciting adventures await....But there is a tinge of sadness in the air as well. Both Cori and Brett are leaving a home, family and friends... childhood homes filled with memories, experiences and a feeling of community...They will come to understand what a special home Sioux Falls has been. Their relationships with family will continue to strengthen and visits from family will treasured time.

Lloyd and Deb Albers have been so wonderful to Cori. I know how hard this will be for Deb to have Brett and Cori living away. The Albers are just good people. I know how excited they are for their family to expand...Grandchildren are the best....(so I have been told by most everyone I know who is a Grandparent.)

Cori called me yesterday to remind me she was 9 weeks into her adventure. She wanted me to promise her at 12 weeks the sickness would go away and she would get back to feeling human. We shared a good laugh I crossed my fingers and said SURE YOU WILL......

What memories her experience brings back...I smile when I think...I did live through my pregnancies...all 4 of them.....but at the time....I was sure I wouldn't make month 4....

I did sent Cori a care package of Ginger goodies....Hopefully the ginger will help.

This past week has been very busy for me.....yet in the midst of busy...came huge blessings....I am still a believer in late night conversations outside under the stars...with someone who you happen to think is pretty amazing....makes me feel more like 25 and alot less like 48....with the exception of my alarm going off at 5:30 am...brought me back to reality very quickly....feeling 25 is exhilarating....being 48 is a little slower off the start.....feeling like permanent snooze...

I will say the evenings this time of the year are why we all live in Arizona...warm, clear sky's, brilliant stars, orange and jasmine blossoms....

Its an evening out with my friends.....Will return and report later...

Carla

Sugar and Spice....

2009-04-14T19:48:00.000-07:00

Tonight I asked Kylie if she would use her sparkle and shin to help me in changing the look of my blog.....She is the very creative and talented one. As you can see...my landscape has changed...Thank you Kylie... I love the pink polka dot with the black bow....very Jackie Kennedy....

Kylie is feeling pink these days as she feels Cori will have a little princess....~Watch me dance, watch me twirl there is a Princess in every Girl~. Oh Thank Heaven for Little Girls....Think Pink...Sugar and Spice and everything Nice....There is no question little girls are divine.

As we have talked Cori has never mentioned leaning more towards pink or blue...Healthy yes....
10 perfectly formed fingers and toes, two eyes, one nose...hair would be nice....all though optional...I would lean towards blue blue eyes.....and of course gorgeous olive skin with huge dimples...and a contagious and adventurous personality....PLUS....

As I have shared this great news with my own sweet mom, she is just thrilled. She has told me many times ~Grand Children are God's Gift to love, spoil and send home with their parents~ Of course my cute mom is already concerned and planning a head by buying lots of diapers, soft blankets, undershirts, socks.. As I have blogged before...my mom is an underwear fanatic...you can never have enough underwear....(thanks mom!). She asks me every time I see her when the baby is coming...My mom was amazing with newborn babies...She had no fear of anything, especially the dreaded first bath.....screaming baby in tow...she would carefully place my baby in the kitchen sink and get started ....I was a nervous wreck....seriously....there were so many times I thought to myself.....if babies only came with instructions....and then I realized babies do come with instructions....a Grandmother....a mother who is seasoned...well trained, fearless, loving, patient and kind. There are precious feelings only a mother and grand mother can share....

It hard for me to get my arms around how quickly 24 years has blown by....I remember those grim days of feeling sick, being sick and wondering if I would really survive...and I did....The bonus of this new role for me is.....I get all of the benefits......and I am not sick, won't have the weight gain....and will leave the hospital feeling amazing....BONUS!!!!!! Life is good!

I was talking to my dear friend Laura....we decided it would only be right for her to also be present when our little soul makes their entrance. Laura and I have been life long friends, we have shared the amazing, wonderful, impossible, timeless, obstacles, heartbreak, birth, death, marriage, divorce and now....GRAND BABIES..... Cori is excited to have us all.....How fabulous...she has this brand new house with room!!!

Cori, Grama wanted me to tell you....she knows you will be a great mommy...and that you and Brett will take such good care of your little one.

For right now....I am not completely in the Sugar and Spice camp....nor the Snakes and Snails and Puppy dog tails....I am pretty much in the neutral gender camp...makes no difference to me....

A special note of thanks to all of you, who have checked in with your well wishes for Cori.....We have been blessed with such great friends......Your constant communication, well wishes and prayers have made such a difference ....Thank you...

Life is so good. I have been so blessed....I am so thankful to a loving Father in Heaven who has paved the way for my eternal family. There is nothing sweeter and more profound than the experience of creation and birth. Certainly not more humbling. The magic and sense of wonder a new life brings provides the encouragement to live strong, choose wisely and love unconditionally....

When I talked to Cori on Sunday I asked her....How are you feeling? and how is my Grand baby? what a wonderful sound to that question. Cori is starting to pack and getting into full time moving mode...she was tired...My grand baby was fine...just fine.

Cori and little one...sweetest dreams to you....

I am sending love, stars and pixie dust your way...

Love Mom

Progress!

2009-04-13T14:12:00.000-07:00

Cori and I have decided to have an ongoing blog about her journey to Motherhood. I will be posting the first Ultra Sound photos in the next few days. Cori and Brett have taken a big promotion which will take them to Maryville Missouri. They have sold their home in Sioux Falls and will be closing in 2 weeks. They have bought a beautiful home in Maryville which will give them plenty of room and they plan to move in May 1st. Cori is taking care of the details up North and Brett is working hard down South. I know the separation has been very hard on Cori..Hang in there love!!!! Your almost there..... We are all so proud of Cori and Brett.

Cori called me very excited this morning she was successful in buying her first round of maternity clothes and everything is cute! Cori has been sick, which is no fun...but she was thrilled to hear that little heart beat....Cori reports she is being very careful to avoid being sick...which makes me smile....Good Luck...and yes Cori your Ginger care package is on the way... She is very tired....and feeling very much like her body is being taken over...(and it is)..She is find a good Doctor once she gets settled. It's so fun to talk almost everyday....Kylie and I are thrilled and looking forward to Diaper duty....ALOT......

This is one of those moments that is so special....a daughter getting married is one thing....which is amazing...fun....but to know your daughter is moving into Motherhood and will experience the most amazing emotions as this little one grows and develops is moving me towards ~speechless~. There is nothing more profound than the life you help create and bring into this world.....

Wendy, you are such a gem. I will share your good wishes with Cori. You have been so good to keep in touch with the kids, you are a good Aunt.......The kids love you!

Please share our blog with everyone in Utah....The next months will be very exciting..and ever changing....and we love to hear what is going on in your world.

I will be doing much of the blogging until Cori is settled.....we would love to hear from all of you....and your predictions....should Cori be thinking pink or blue?

She is making progress everyday!!! and getting closer to the day......

We love you Cori....

Great Expectations.....in 2009

2009-04-02T21:04:00.000-07:00

Dateline: Friday March 27, 2009.....Phone call from Cori Albers...I knew the minute I heard my daughters voice something was different, exciting and newsworthy. "Mom.....I am pregnant" Oh my.....I found my thoughts rushing back to the day I found out I was pregnant with Cori I was just thrilled I was going to have a baby.....The great expectations....sharing such wonderful news with our families....and then the 9 month count down. I was just thrilled.....What Fabulous News! I am going to be a Grandmother....for the first time.

Cori and Brett's good news...brought tears to my eyes as I reflected on my own journey..Oh how 24 years has flown by....Those days of Osh Kosh By Gosh and Esprit dresses, hair bows, everything pink for my little princess only to find out...she really loved her superman pj's and cape more than the crown. Cori will be an amazing mother. She has such a huge capacity to love and nurture. She is such a good homemaker and she has such a great support in Brett. My little daughter has taken that most important step in life.....Having a Baby....Their lives will never be the same....their lives will be filled with wonder, excitement, anticipation and blessings. Brett and Cori cannot even begin to imagine the emotions, tender feelings and blessings that will flow into their home. Those fat little fingers and toes, that amazing baby smell that will flood their home.....pink, blue, green, yellow.....sugar, spice and everything nice.

The next months will bring great changes, extraordinary feelings of wonder as your little one takes shape and starts to prepare for their arrival. Some days you will feel sick, most days so tired, everyday you will feel divine intervention as the miracle of pregnancy starts to unfold.

Time has passed very quickly....It's now your turn Cori...to be a first time mommy. Oh how lucky your little one is. You and Brett will be fine parents, you are an amazing team. I am so proud of you both.

November will be a month of great expectations. We love you Cori and Brett...and baby.....

Hang in there Cori....you will soon be with Brett, settling into a new world and new life. I love you so much and am there with you.....

Mom

Joy and Abundance......

2009-03-15T20:07:00.000-07:00

As the days of March going blowing by....I had a remarkable experience tonight...I was thinking of all of the turmoil around me, and I was feeling such joy and abundance in my life. I am at peace. Peace is an amazing feeling when I feel my Savior close at hand. I smile as I type tonight as the events of the past are just that....a passing away...I feel calm and at peace. As I reflect the major events of my life...I am thankful, grateful and appreciate the experiences that have shaped my life and the person that I am. For a long time I felt my past owned my future. I didn't understand the power of forgiveness, grace and unconditional love. I wasn't comfortable really peeling back the layers of my life, my experiences and my emotions. As I stood at the crossroads it is with love that I can leave those painful memories of my past, those destructive relationships, the judgment of those closest to me. I let go of all of those experiences with love and gratitude for the lessons learned. I feel my Savior's love, his presence and his guidance daily. There are times he will calm the storm....there are other times he allows the storm to rage..but he calms the child.....Life is not about fearing the storm as it rages...life is about learning to dance in the rain....

March 17, 2009 marks a milestone...Ethan will be 17, it is truly his golden birthday. Over the past two weeks I have been in touch with all of my kids more than usual....I have been blessed to spend time with Griffin. I am so proud of the man he is. I appreciate the courage in which he lives his life. I appreciate his love, grace and care. I have been blessed with four amazing children. I am often reminded by others what nice kids I have. I am a great mom. A calling I hold to be the dearest...The joy I feel from the relationships I have created with each of my children is priceless. As time continues to march by....I have so much to look forward to .....life experiences of my kids getting married, grandchildren...and my spending time with an amazing companion. The possibilities are endless.....and exciting...

Many changes are coming for my small family all of them are blessings and amazing.

Saturday I had lunch with my mom. She is always happy, always wanting to share her good fortune, a great story and we laugh...As we were talking she shared her memories of her early married life with me. We shared many laughs, many tears but more importantly she shared her feelings of my being a part of her life. As I listened to her many stories, her feelings and the many outcomes....I admired her so much. I look back over her life and can understand more fully the life she lead and the sacrifices she made to live her life. My mom has become a great story teller. She made the comment that this is not how she envisioned living out her life...alone. She is very much concerned about not being able to live with my dad. I am saddened she is so aware of his absence.

I see death and dying everyday...My heart aches for all my families. When I spend time with my mom, its hard to know she will always be in the care of someone else until her time. I know Grampa and Grandma Gibby, Aunt Lois, Uncle Bill just to name a few are standing by cheering mom on. They will be ready and waiting....on this side of the veil....we are all cheering mom on and learning the lessons of unconditional love and service. I was at the cemetery on Friday and a daughter shared with me she was devastated when her mother passed away 13 years ago. She was very close to her mom...and not as close to her dad. She dreaded having to take care of him. She was very emotional as she was sharing her sweet testimony with me on how the Savior knew exactly what lessons she was in need of. She took such good care of her sweet father...for 13 years....they grew to be fast friends..She grew in her capacity to forgive him, cherish him and relish their time together. What a wonderful opportunity to look inside ourselves to realize how the Savior is always willing to provide the lessons and experiences that allow us to grow and become more like him.

Our Sacrament meeting was outstanding today....Three exceptional talks on the Atonement. The spirit was so strong, those who spoke were so real and courageous in sharing their "hard-road" experiences....Again proof positive the Lord has provided a way back....we just have to muster the courage to walk right into the storm...fearing nothing. There is a silver lining just on the other side....

I am thankful for my blessings, my children, dear friends, good health, the continuous prosperity that is ever so present in my life.

I see the divine in every aspect of life daily. I see and feel the tender mercies that take place all around me. I use to think I am lucky.................today I know I am blessed and watched over. More importantly I am a daughter of God. His Grace has blessed me with so many gifts and talents, he is so willing to share his kingdom of joy and abundance with all of us.

My heart is full....thank you for listening, reading,commenting.....

Carla

Heaven on Earth...

2009-01-30T18:18:00.000-08:00

It's been a very busy couple of weeks. I have assisted a couple of friends of mine who have lost loved ones. Its a very humbling experience to receive the call that someones loved one has quietly slipped through the veil into the eternities. It then becomes a sacred responsibility when the family requests that I be the one to assist them in making those most difficult final arrangements. I consider their trust and confidence in my ability a sacred trust. I stand in awe of those who merit the right to be buried in their Temple Clothing...those who have pressed forward, endured the many adversities of this mortal existence through illness, divorce, death, wayward children to finally graduating from this Earth School experience with high honors. I am so very blessed with daily reminders of "Heaven on Earth" moments.

As this work week came to a close I decided to stop in and see my mom. She was thrilled to see me...and asked if I would rub her feet. We talked about the many great accomplishments of her day. She took be back to her past and shared some very funny dating experiences with me. I love to spend time with my mom, she is one of the happiest people I know. She is so grateful for all of the little things that make life so grand...She treasured every visitor she has during the course of her day. She loves SONIC....A double cheeseburger with mustard and pickles, tater tots with a Lime Ricky...(a cherry limeade)..she loves to get out...lunch, dinner, movies....she loves Dots....a box of dots can turn an ordinary day into an extraordinary day filled with cherry, orange, yellow, green candies....She loves great popcorn....along with a diet anything....and she loves to watch movies.

I always feel inspired after I visit my mom....She is happy with the little treasures that make life so grand....Happiness is a gift.....

Tomorrow night is Mt. View's Winter Formal....Ethan will be drop dead gorgeous in his new suit....great hair....and incredible smile....He is such a blessing to me. I have enjoyed every minute of him...He is so in tune with his own feelings...as well as the feelings of others. He is a peacemaker, comedian, leader, musician and one of the most intentional young men I know. I smile when he tells me....When he is a huge record producer...he is going to make sure I am taken care of.....it's never if....only WHEN.....He never misses an opportunity to tell me he loves me, never misses an change to give me a big hug.....Never misses an opportunity to share a kindness...

Kylie is 20....and really enjoying life...She is so busy with school and dating.....She is blooming.
it's so fun to watch and more fun to be apart of ........there is nothing like late night conversations with both of my kids to catch up with the life events that are so important...

I am so blessed and have everything to be grateful for...The Lord is so good to me....

I am fortunate to experience Heaven on Earth...Daily...

Carla

Possibilities.....2009

2009-01-18T14:05:00.000-08:00

I was asked by a friend at church today if I was going to update my blog.....Thank Heaven's I have such great friends. There has been so much life that has transpired since my last entry in November. There was a great week end spend at James Ray in Las Vegas. His Harmonic Wealth Week end was amazing. I love the book "The Secret" and James Ray was one of the big contributors which was very cool. I took in every minute and learned a lot about my past, my present and my incredible future.

Thanksgiving came and ushered in the official start of the Holidays. I have so much in my heart to share regarding the Holidays and the precious moments I was able to share with my children. As I look back on my adult life, I have been so blessed to be able to raise my 4 really nice kids. I have been there, we have shared laughs, tears, many Kodak moments, dances, weddings, graduations, milestones that only occur once, maybe twice is you are lucky....I have been blessed to present, to be here and share in those moments that are precious and short. I am so very grateful my children invite me back. I reflected back to the early years of being a young mother...to today as my children are grown. The time has been so very short...but so profoundly meaningful. I have grown as a woman, mother and friend...I have learned to not sweat the small stuff so much...and trust in the fact..everything really does work out for our best. The hand of Divinity is constantly encouraging me through small but significant nudges on my shoulder.

Christmas was so special this year. We were able to spend a lot of time together..long talks, dinners, movies, shopping, wrapping presents, parties and get togethers. I spent time with friends I love...listening to Christmas music that warms my heart, wrapping the perfect gifts, decorating our home and of course watching our favorite Christmas Movies which seem to be more meaningful every year. It's hard not to watch It's a Wonderful Life and not reflect on my own George Baily moments and yet every time I hear a bell ring...I know another Angel gets their wings. My heart knows the difference between stuff and meaningful gifts of the heart.

The new year offers new opportunities...a realm of infinite possibilities for relationships, love, business and red carpet walks. My heart is full, my cup runneth over and the universe is mine to explore. Watch me create.....and bring my life into being.

Carla

Great Minds......

2008-11-16T17:23:00.001-08:00

I have come to appreciate great minds, those who are creative, positive and willing to dream of the potential of a great team....I was invited to attend a "Power Week-End" with three amazing women...The four of us came together ...each of us filled with ideas and projects we would like to bring to fruition. We enjoyed the day spa at the Sheraton at Wild Horse Pass...I have come to appreciate the power of a turban thinking cap....while wrapped in a fluffy spa robe while being soaked, buffed, polished and massaged. There was lunch pool side, inside jokes and many many belly laughs.....As I was sitting with my feet dangling in the hot tub I was privileged to watch the colors of night fall on the desert. The stars were close behind sharing just enough of their light to create the perfect silhouettes of the cactus's just beyond the fence. I was amazed at how quietly the process took place around me. I was in awe at the beauty and the serene feelings I was experiencing.

As we sat by the fireplace in the spa lounge and planned our evening....Room service was at the top of our list. We drove over to the hotel savoring the memories of the day. That night we prioritized our list of projects and how we are going to achieve our goals. We brainstormed until late into the night....

I am blessed to be a part of such an extraordinary group of friends. Women who are passionate, inspiring, courageous and incredible facilitators for making life happen.

My dear friend Laura came in from Salt Lake. It was treasured time. She and I went over to see my mom. Laura had stopped to get my mom a few goodies...We had a wonderful visit and dinner with my dad and other friends Saturday evening. Good friends are good for the soul. Laura and I never say good by.....we look forward to our next adventure together.

which is coming soon............................

Who ever said....Great minds think alike......must have had girlfriends like me.....

Election Week......

2008-11-07T07:11:00.000-08:00

Today is Friday.....as I set down for a quiet minute to gather my thoughts and share those feelings with you....The elections are over, the campaign signs have been taken down, the radio and TV are free from the relentless negative adds that were bought and paid for and we as individuals, families, communities and a nation come to grips with the outcome. As a child and young adult I was repeatedly told we live in perilous times and the last days. As I look back over the last 30 years....(which is a little scary to admit I have that many years under my belt....) I have been a personal witness to the change in human hearts. In my world today the epidemic of choice is the lack of personal responsibility. The lack of caring, compassion, serving others....I see examples daily of how the lack of personal responsibility has affected parents, families, schools, communities and our nation. I grew up in a home where information was important. My parents encouraged me to be not only aware of local and national happenings but to watch the news, read the newspaper and be informed. I find myself today joining the ranks of many who no longer read the local paper or watch the news.....It's a rare day when good news is reported...and repeated.... I find many of the goings on.....disheartening....

Working in the Funeral Business....I have witnessed first hand the devastation of individuals who left the path of personal responsibility and began their journey down the path of no return. I hold and comfort parents, siblings, grand parents and friends who are left heartbroken and shattered and asking what brought them all to this point of no return.

We live in very perilous times....However all is not lost......I find en light of what is going on around me....I feel calm, joyous and excited about today and many opportunities I will have to share my glad message. Hope is ever present...One of my favorite quotes if from Gandhi, " You must be the change you wish to see in the world..." If I want more joy in my world....I must share more joy.... As I was sharing my political views with a Bishop earlier this week, we were at opposite ends of the political spectrum....He called me Thursday to chide me about his party's victory.....and my response was....Bishop your right on the one hand....yet it's the Lord who is at the helm of this earthly ship.....finally we were in agreement with each other...We were both registered and active members of the Lord's party. There is much work to be accomplished regardless of the adversity, challenges and trials each one of us will experience not just once but frequently along our sojourn. As we hold to the iron rod, engage our personal responsibility and stay close to the Savior we are assured what our outcome will be....no need to fear....just expand our faith.

I also been blessed to witness extraordinary miracles of healing, forgiveness, kindness and the compassion of so many. There is countless good.....As we embark on the season of Thanksgiving and Christmas my heart if full. The older and wiser I become the more I cherish the gifts of the heart.....I remember as my children were in elementary school and would bring home the most incredible hand made treasures home for me. Today I find the same joy in listening to the beautiful music, those treasured moments when all of my children are together again, spending time with my family and hearing from my friends... What a wonderful time of the year....

As the retailers brace for a very bleak Holiday shopping season....and the media is driving the fear of the unknown.....into homes....I feel at peace....The joy of the season is not in the bleak Holiday retail forecast...The joy of the season is much like faith.....the little seed that if nourished will grown and produce an amazing outcome for each of us. Joy is very much the same....Joy in understand the Savior's unconditional love for each of us, his atoning sacrafice, knowing that life is eternal...Those are the most important gifts....

The final exit poll is the only poll that matters.

Carla

It all Depends.....

2008-10-27T10:34:00.000-07:00

I had the opportunity to take my mom to church with me Sunday. Ethan went over to pick her up..she was excited and waiting outside. She had mentioned to Kylie and I during our visit Saturday she wanted to run away, she wanted to have something to look forward to, getting out, visiting, going to lunch. It was almost as if she was telling us. "I want to feel normal again, return to my old life of family, friends and routine if only for a little while..."

It was our Primary program. As we sat in the back pew, my mom commented as Haley, Maddy, Jackson and Jake all walked by to take their places on the stand. I smiled as I explained that Haley, Maddy, Jackson and Jake (who are my sister Sara's children) were not in my ward and they were not on the stand. Why say anything? But my cute mom was just sure it was Haley on the stand helping to narrate the program. As the children began to sing so did my mom. Ethan and I smiled as she sang with everything she had and those around me smiled as well. She remembered every word and knew every song. After 45 minutes she made up her mind she needed to go to the bathroom. I reminded her she was wearing depends and she wouldn't have to get up. Bless my mother's heart. She decided she was going...up she went, grabbing her walker and heading towards the exit. I grabbed my purse and off we went. In the bathroom she decided her depends was on backwards and she wanted it taken off and put back on the right way.....After 4 times of trying to put her depends back on ...every which way but sideways....she was very unhappy with me, she was down right mad...She told me I was wrong and I found myself....in the midst of a battle I was never going to win. As I patiently tried to explain the front from the back. To no avail. I knew right then and there I was not going to win the battle of the depends. She was right...after all it all depends on how we choose to look at life.

I felt the tears well up in my eyes. Once again my mother was teaching me an invaluable life lesson....another treasured moment. As I looked into her eyes I saw her frustration. My mom has always been fiercely independent, very successful, never choosing to complain and always willing and able to serve those around her. I thought how her life has declined in the past year. Most of the change is dramatic and life changing. I took my mom by the hand and conceded she was right....with a smile and said....it all depends how you look at it. She found the humor in my play on words and we both laughed....washed our hands and she decided she was ready to go.

Much like life, most situations are defined by the way we choose to see things. It depends on how we feel, could be the day, the hour, an unwelcome comment, stress or....depending on how we are feeling...it could be the most amazing day, experience, conversation, break through, discovery or moment of growth.

I received a call from Parker Smith regarding his farewell and reception. Parker is such a sweet young man, his mother had been a great friend who passed away this past April after a courageous battle with cancer. I asked Parker about his temple experience...and what it was like passing through the veil....he shared with me the over whelming feeling of his mother's spirit...he knew she was with him every step of the way. What an amazing mother Cyd was....and her legacy will be great as she raised righteous children.

In our family we have made the effort to take a daily inventory of our blessings. We take a Gratitude moment and share with each other what we are individually grateful for. As Kylie and I drove home...our list was overflowing.....we have been very blessed.....on every front.

My mom was right, it all depends on how we chose to look at it.

Thanks Mom....we love you!

Carla

Belly Laughs.....

2008-10-21T19:47:00.000-07:00

I have had the best couple of weeks...the minutes, hours and days have been filled with such opportunity and positive energy. I have been blessed with amazing friends. Girlfriends who are treasures...the kind of friends who are always within reach and always in touch. This past week end was a great example of ~Girlfriend Time~...getting together with friends I love. I have come to appreciate the power of laughter....not just laughter but BELLY LAUGHING...those moments when your eyes begin to water and you can't control the moment...you just laugh and laugh and laugh...until your belly let's you know....that is the most exercise your abs have had in months...

I have been blessed with a great sense of humor and positive attitude. I prefer to look on the bright side...the silver lining side, the glass half full side, the greener side of the grass....side. I have found I like to surround myself with friends who also choose to take the road less traveled....versus the path of least resistance, those who live on the sunny side of the street.

I also have come to appreciate the law of physics that says....you get what you give. I have been blessed with humbling experiences of forgiveness, courage and the strength to endure. Its no surprise we reap the seeds we sow. How many times have I been blessed with the opportunity to go back to apologize to someone I have offended, get the second chance to make that first great impression. Some would call it luck.....I call it personal growth and being in tune. Spiritually in tune to know when those precious teaching moments come my way...A chance for me to improve...to let go of hard feelings, a chance to empathize with an other's point of view, a chance to draw closer to my Savior. A chance to stop and savor the incredible moments in my life.

Monday evening after dinner with friends, Kylie, Ethan and I went to see Grandma Mannes. She was thrilled to see us. We had a couple of great belly laughs....we all gathered around Grandma and listened to her stories of her youth...as her memory continues to fade...we smile as we listen to the same stories...those times in her life that stand out as treasured memories...Grandma recounts the family vacations to Yellowstone. How much she loved to travel with her family. Her Grandmothers and spending time in Ogden with them. When it comes right down to it.....each of us are busy gathering those treasured memories that we will carry with us ....through our life and our life to come.... will we look back with regret wishing we had lived more and feared less...maybe even wishing we had belly laughed more....or live with such gratitude we are fearless about showing love, kindness, forgiveness and always looking for that sunny side of the street.

As I look around me I am grateful for the challenges that are mine. I am so grateful for goodly parents, my mothers courage not only raising me in the gospel but allowing me to share in this very difficult time in her life as she endures to the end. I am grateful for the optimistic heart I was blessed with...the ability to smile, laugh and carry on. I am so grateful for my strength of spirit....I am so very proud of my life's accomplishments....my children..who are my greatest legacy...I am grateful for those good souls who have loved my children and helped me in raising them. I am grateful for defining moments of courage in which I see those areas in my life I can improve...I am most grateful that I merited the opportunity to come down to this earth to gain my physical body, gain life experience, understand the power of agency, feel loved and be able to love those around me.

I am very grateful for those who love me unconditionally, those who have given me support and a shoulder when I have needed it, those who have been willing participants to share in my life.

I am most grateful...for the feeling of joy....which in turn.....is Belly Laughs...

Carla

The Wasatch Front.....

2008-10-14T20:58:00.000-07:00

Fall Break surrounded by gorgeous fall leaves, the majestic mountains of the Wasatch Front and waking Sunday morning to huge snowflakes blanketing the ground....does it get any better than this? I would dare to say absolutely not. It was quiet an adventure taking the kids and spending our fall break up north. In July I was talking to my dear friend Laura when she said....come up for fall break....we would have a blast. Ethan and Kylie agreed so into motion our get away was planned. Ethan and I drove up and enjoyed every minute of our travels. Not only was the scenery captivating the conversation between mother and son was memorable. The leaves on the trees were indescribably brilliant with hues of red, orange, yellow and gold. We were experiencing fall in all of her splendor, crisp air, gorgeous leaves and snow capped mountain peaks. Laura's home is exceptional....complete with breath taking landscaping, deer running through her yard, a panoramic view of the Salt Lake Valley....her home is a sanctuary to all. Photo's of our Utah experience forth coming.....

Kylie flew up Thursday evening, she had a date Friday evening and for the BYU Homecoming football game on Saturday. It was fun shopping for the perfect outfit and accessories for her..

We spent time together and we spent time apart. My time up North was chicken soup for my soul....there is something wonderful about spending time with old dear friends....I have been blessed not only with great friends whom I admire but friendships that have endured the test of time, distance and life's defining moments. Laura and I always see a couple of friends for lunch....take in some shopping and drive the streets of Salt Lake looking for the perfect home in the perfect neighborhood....We compare the architecture, landscaping and unique qualities of each home...its a hobby we enjoy.

I have always loved the Wasatch Front...since my early days of traveling to Utah. There is a feeling of safety in the mountains for me. Memories of being a young mother came flooding back ....driving by the hospital were each of my children were born, seeing the Jordan River Temple illuminated in the west valley like a beacon drawing you near. Bumping into old friends, frequenting favorite restaurants and shopping hot spots. Driving through areas that use to be..farmland....now are very developed office buildings and strip malls. 27 years has past since I first ventured out west.... One thing is a constant it was amazing to see the snow...I felt the most festive I have felt in years on Sunday morning when I woke up to a winter wonderland......its funny how snow makes me feel like Christmas...like all is right with the world.

I am so grateful I was able to travel with safety and that my children had an exceptional time seeing family and friends....I am grateful we were able to share memorable conversations about life and relationships. I am blessed.

I stopped in to visit with my mom tonight....She was thrilled to see me. She was quick to offer a hug and kiss as she whispered in my ear.....so good to see you, I have missed you...and I love you...We talked about the Wasatch front....her growing up in Ogden...Grama Boyington's porch swing....and the summers in Yellowstone. We had a wonderful visit of old times and memories....I love my mom...and am so grateful for the example she set and raising me to persevere through life...to never give up....to be strong...It is through my mother's awesome example I am where I am today. She has been a cornerstone even in those times I couldn't appreciate her point of view.

Thank you mom....for everything....every talent you helped me develop and every fear you helped me over come. I want you to know....I know the best is yet to be....

Carla

Count your many blessings....name them one by one..

2008-10-07T20:16:00.000-07:00

My day was off to a fairly regular start when the first two calls came around 10:30 am. I was in a meeting but felt impressed to check my phone. I saw Cori's text message, "MOM CALL ASAP!" from Brett's phone. I felt immediate panic as I could not get them to answer or to respond by text message. When it comes to your kids...there is no time like the present to get the answers you are desperately seeking...so I called Cori's store. When I asked for her, they told me they would page for her. When she didn't pick up, I then asked to have Brett paged. (A huge benefit is having Cori and Brett working in the same store.) Brett did not respond either....Then a voice spoke...May I ask who is calling...I replied Cori's mom....can you please help me. Then the dreaded words no parent ever wants to hear...."Cori had a accident this morning at the store and is on the way to the emergency room".....I mustered the courage to ask what had happened....she replied..."Cori cut herself with a box cutter on her leg and by the looks of her cut, she would need stitches."...... Then a faint relief came over me....stitches.....on her leg.....

Memories flooded my mind of the time Cori had ventured down a large hill on a scooter one Sunday afternoon.....Cori was always my child who feared nothing...especially speed...as she raced down that hill she lost control and took a nasty spill and had a quiet neighborhood in an uproar as those sitting outside enjoy the afternoon saw her careening out of control towards a mail box and curb. When the phone call came, I was told to expect the worst...my heart stopped beating for a moment as I tried to summon the courage that only comes when your child is hurt. As I approached the scene...I was taken back by the large crowd of those attending to Cori. A very kind woman had quickly covered her chin which was completely split open with a wash cloth. As she assured Cori all would be well. I was in a state of panic, shock and disbelief.. I offered a quiet prayer as quickly loaded Cori into the van. As we drove the hospital I was feeling sick just looking at the damage that had been done. Would she have scars? Was her chin fractured? so many questions.....

While I was trying to keep Cori calm and comfortable a peace came over both of us. Her dad came to give her a blessing. A blessing of comfort, healing and peace. The minute he laid his hands on her head...she was completely relaxed and calm. As I contemplated that experience today.....I stopped to take stock in all of my blessings....counting each of them one by one.....The Lord has been most gracious in blessing my children with good health, strength, love for each other, open minds, unconditional love, each with a great sense of humor, a strong belief that anything is possible, looking for the good in others, educational opportunities, great friends..and on and on.....The countless blessings that out weigh the adversity.

Then my phone rang...it was Cori....as she retold of her unfortunate experience....she focused on the blessings.....she was ok...and she would adjust to life with 5 new stitches...she was going to finish her day back at the store...She is a fighter...never gives up...on anything or more importantly anyone. Cori is an amazing woman...I am so proud of her. She was lucky to find the man of her dreams early on. Brett and Cori make a great team....I am so blessed to call them both my kids....

Am I lucky? or am I blessed..... I AM BLESSED....and lucky.....I have it all......

Tomorrow I travel back home...to Salt Lake. I love Salt Lake and the majestic Wasatch Front. As Ethan and I are driving....he will be sleeping and I will be counting my blessings....

To each of you......may you have the desires of your heart, health and peace in your families and safety in your travels....

Carla

Homecoming......The 1st Big Date.....

2008-10-05T12:23:00.000-07:00

There are many milestone in a mother's life. There is that first blessed event of learning that you are going to have a baby....at times those days and months turn into years and wondering if the Lord really knew what he was asking of us.....then with all of the energy you can muster..just one more push......and then the little miracle appears on the scene...all I ever cared about was having a healthy baby...10 fingers, 10 toes and the final thumbs up from my doctor letting me know everything was well. Then as if your baby did come with instructions the most magical journey begins....with that little smile, a little goo.....that first roll over, sitting up, crawling and then walking. Running, riding a bike, collecting all kinds of wild life and friends its as if....the evolution is a blueprint of how creation really is intended to work....The child like qualities of faith, unconditional love, dreams, enthusiasm, passion and just plain believing that Santa Clause is coming and he is bring you everything on your list.

Last night I took the journey of a lifetime with my youngest son Ethan. He attended his first "Homecoming". This amazing little son of mine has grown into an amazing young man. Ethan is delightful. He chose his homecoming attire, the perfect corsage for his date, and planned the activity after the dance with such thought and precision. Reminded me of my daughters and how finding the perfect outfit for a big date became an event. We had a wonderful time shopping...laughing and then the dress rehearsal....He looked smashing.....His date was a beautiful girl named, Carolyn. The two of them together looked like Prince Charming and Cinderella.

After the dance my dear friend Lisa opened her home for the kids to come over hang out playing Rock Band, Movies and of course her world famous Swedish Crepes.....and they all came. Ethan confided in me with a huge hug and kiss the evening was perfect. The perfect first date....I am so grateful for the sweet relationships I have with all of my children....last night was just icing on the giant cake of motherhood for me. How cool that my son and his friends would come over and spend time with Lisa and myself. Its one of the most treasured moments as a mother...when your children not only see you as a mother, but a cherished friend, passionate supporter and the Kool Aid mom...The mom who kids accept as being an ok adult to hang out with.....

The evening is now past....just a wonderful memory in Ethan's book of life. Only one of many perfect evenings, perfect dates and great friends. I am profoundly grateful he was willing to share his big moment with me. There will be photo's to mark the event.....but no greater mark than was left upon my heart.

Life's magical moments...that are once in a lifetime..Moments so dear it would cause a mother to stop and ponder these precious feelings in her heart.

Carla

The girls who get it......

2008-10-02T20:52:00.000-07:00

I have often asked myself..why have I been so blessed with such great friends....Women who are extraordinary in their accomplishments with family, community and profession. I call these women..."the girls who get it"... The girls who get...the importance of faith, friendship, love, loyalty, encouragement and the power of intention. Friends who love unconditionally, always pray for my good and continually cheer me.

My week has been an incredible exchange of energy with "the girls who get it"....Women who understand the power of creation and intention. As I ponder the events, conversations and time spent with these great friends, I find myself embracing the realm of possibilities like never before. I have often told my children they have the ability to change world...I have seen their child like faith move mountains, I have witnessed each one of my children running towards the fence in playing out their dreams. Reaching farther and farther...never believing for a minute in words like...can't, shouldn't, won't...only focusing on the endless possibilities...

The more I am open to the realm of possibility..the more the world opens to me...I am guided and directed to those who are waiting to assist me on the next leg of my journey. It is with faith and hope I move on. I am continually learning..lessons that encourage me to dig deeper to develop my gifts and talents..lessons that turn hurt into understanding, lessons that are working to refine me..

I look for the Upside...I choose to see the positive in myself and others. I am a woman who is exercising my child like faith and running towards the fence of my dreams, creating my life and feeling joy and fulfillment. Having the courage to fill the measure of my creation.

I choose to be one of those girls who get it....

Carla

Popcorn and Inspiration....

2008-09-29T21:12:00.000-07:00

Today is Monday September 29, 2008. I am just getting over "Strep Throat" which has taken its toll over the past 10 days. I have felt a little disconnected from the world and especially my mom. I decided tonight after dinner I would make her some popcorn(a favorite treat of hers) and go visit. My mom is adjusting to life in an assisted living group home. She is no longer capable of living on her own and the level of care she needs is more than anyone of us could give her. She is living in a wonderful group home with a staff of caregivers who are truly amazing. Her safety and care was paramount to each of us..

When I drove up to the house tonight I had to smile....The gorgeous cape cod style house was decked out in Halloween attire....Very seasonal....I was greeted warmly as always... I walked up the stairs and Bonnie was in with my mom getting her ready for bed. My mom was excited to see me and the first thing she asked was..."Carla, I am so glad to see you, you must have felt inspired to visit me tonight....I was hoping you would come." With popcorn in hand and feeling very inspired we had an amazing 90 minutes. We shared a connection, tears, memories and many good belly laughs.

I felt helpless when tears flooded her eyes, "I want to go home, I just want to go home, I am ready to begin a new chapter in my life." she said. I thought how profound...a new chapter in her life. As her Alzheimer's progresses I am astounded how clearly she thinks and communicates for those few precious moments. She shared her tears and frustrations with me, going as far as to apologize for feeling the need to complain, which is something my mom just doesn't do...complain....she reminded me complaining does no good anyway...because nobody wants to listen to a complainer. I tried to fight the tears myself but to no avail....the free fall had begun. As I listened to my mom express her concerns about her Alzheimer diagnosis my heart ached. How could this be happening? and of course why my sweet mom? She then shifted to a place of bravery. She reminded me life is no picnic and troubles come to all. We talked about many spiritual experiences and the most touching was her personal witness that the veil which separates us from our loved ones on the other side is very thin and not to far away. She expressed her love for her parents and the admiration she had for her mother. She shared her favorite childhood experience of taking the train to Yellowstone...or for that matter driving in her dad's old truck with the shell on top. She called those trips really living.... She would then revert back to her wall of pictures and say...there are a bunch of happy faces on my wall....I am lucky to go to bed and wake up every morning with all of those happy faces looking at me.

We talked about my children and how very proud she is of each one of them. We reminisced about heartfelt memories. I am so grateful my children will always have such fond memories of Grandma Mannes. My mom looked at me tonight and said..."I hope we take more good memories than the bad ones when we leave this earth." I told her I bet we do. I felt of my mother's sweet testimony and was touched when she asked if I would kneel in prayer with her at her bedside. What an honor to share that priceless moment with my mom.

I am most grateful for....popcorn and a mother's inspiration.

Carla

September and Christmas Music

2008-09-26T19:38:00.000-07:00

Fall has officially arrived, which in any other part of the country would mean crisp cool air, a gorgeous parade of leaves as they start to fall from the trees, dusting off your favorite sweater, high school football games, apple cider and enjoying cooler weather. I actually miss the changing of seasons. I feel like I am missing an important signal that a new season is being ushered in. I have always loved fall and the symbolism of plenty, the harvest, gratitude and the onset of the Holiday Season.

Growing up in South Dakota fall meant beautiful Indian summer days, cool crisp nights and the turning of the leaves. My favorite tree is the Sugar Maple with brilliant shades of reds, golds and yellows. To this day there stands the most beautiful Sugar Maple on the corner of Phillips Avenue and 33rd Street in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. I use to drive by that tree everyday and use to think....what a work of art. The huge branches seem to reach out to me and whisper...slow down and enjoy....I still take that drive everyday and imagine the grandeur of that tree this time of the year.

So tonight as I blog...I turned on tranquil Christmas music and feel my mind flood with such sweet memories and feelings of why the season of fall is so important to me. When I take an inventory of my life, family, experiences, blessings and opportunities its hard not to take pause and feel my heart flood with gratitude. I have been blessed with 4 really amazing human beings whom I am blessed to call my children. I am so very proud of them. Each one has been blessed with amazing gifts, talents and an enthusiasm for life, living and running after their dreams. It's so fun to watch them grow and know I have had a small part in their lives. One of the great blessings of motherhood....watching your children grow, experience the ups and downs, the love and tears and have the courage to pursue their dreams. A gift. I am also taking inventory on grand dogs....we have 5. Griffin and Jackie have (2), Cori and Brett have (2) and Kylie has (1). No grand babies...just grand dogs........

I have been blessed with great friends. Life long friends who have walked beside me during my darkest hours and have been so very present for my accomplishments, defining moments and a great big belly laugh. One of my dearest friends is Laura Robinson, she lives in Salt Lake City. I have always admired her drive, accomplishments, passion for life, willingest to take risks and her successes. She is generous, kind, honest and we are kindred spirits. There is never a judgement only encouragement. She has wiped many a tear away, helped me see the possibilities in myself when I was ready to give up. She is always cheering me on. I was blessed to meet another great friend in Stacy Beckstead who lives outside of Seattle. She is another noble soul who has a passion for life, motherhood, grand motherhood, a great red nail polish...and travel. Stacy is another who never judges..only encourages. We have been blessed to stay connected to each other... our plan is to all live in California one day....in an assisted living center so we can live out our days laughing and being girls.

I have been blessed with great friends in Mesa as well. There is something very wonderful about girls, dinner and 70's music we all appreciate. Sadly as time passes there are more single women about. I say only sadly because no one wants to see their family broken....on the other hand.....just think what the world could accomplish if everyone of us had a great wife at home.....there would be world peace, no divorce, stocked pantry's, spotless laundry rooms and literally no child left behind.... ha ha ha....it's just a thought....

I am grateful for the gift of family. Family in my opinion is the greatest source of strength and happiness but can be the greatest source of frustration at times also. I guess this could be what the Lord meant when he said...."There must needs be opposition is all things".... and this too shall give thee experience.

Its Friday night....tonight there are no football games I will be going to, no real crisp air to talk about...(That is coming next week), no pulling out my sweater tonight.....However there is Christmas music playing....candles burning and a feeling of gratitude as I take inventory of all of my blessings.....

Carla

The Upside....

2008-09-22T12:37:00.000-07:00

Greetings,

My children will be so pleased to know I have catapulted into the age of Blogging and technology. My name is Carla, I have four amazing children Griffin 25, Cori 23, Kylie 19 and Ethan 17. I smile as I was typing Griffin and Cori's ages. It wasn't to many years ago I wondered if I would ever be out of diapers, sleepless nights, play groups, potty training and sibling rivalry which only continues with the next two in the family. I smile because I have come to appreciate how good every minute of life can be and on the other hand how short our time on earth really is.

I could and should write a book called "The 10 stupid things I did when I was 39". Something tells me it has the potential to became a national best seller...With that being said...I have been a life long student of this educational process called life. All in all it has been a great ride. If I were to complain about anything...it would be how quickly the days, months and years pass. Sometimes I wish I could hold out my hand to stop the quick progression. Since that won't happen I am learning to enjoy the journey instead of planning my stay at my destination.

My mother is a great source of strength to me. She is an elect lady. She has always been willing and able to handle the many challenges life has thrown her way. Her life is one great opportunity she has capitalized on time and time again. I smile as I share with you, her desire to eradicate warn and frayed under ware from female humanity. She always asked me prior to my leaving the house if I had on clean under ware. I was a Senior in High School on a snowy winter night in Aberdeen South Dakota when I was in a car accident. As I was being transported into the waiting ambulance, I remembered how lucky I was to have worn clean under ware out that night. My mom was waiting for me at the door of the emergency room...she look at me and then asked that tell tale question....I could look at her and answer honestly....CLEAN UNDER WARE.

My mom's kindness and generosity left imprints on many in our small community. Her charity never needed a reason or confirmation. She just acted.

As my mom's mind drifts into her past, I feel tears and sadness that this great women is now in the sunset of her life. There are so many times I want to call her to tell her about my day, feel her hug and encouragement for pressing forward. She was an ordinary girl, born in Ogden Utah. She lived an extraordinary life. The more I look back, the more I am thankful for my mom's legacy.

I would love when she would sit down at our piano and play "Alice Blue Gown". A song she still holds dear. A couple of weeks ago my older brother started to record her history, asking her questions and taping her responses. I was touched in many ways by hearing what she holds so dear. She commented to me on one of our outings, her greatest treasure was her family. She told me, the interest she has earned on her lifetime investment are her children and grandchildren..her comment was not a bad return...

I am blessed. The more I let go of the little things the more I see the hand of God around me. I am learning to have faith and believe that life does work out even better than we can imagine.

The upside...I have long put away the diapers, picked up the toys, shared my last car pool as I have entered into a new season in my life. As my children continue to live their own lives, I play a duel role in their lives as teacher and more importantly student. My children have taught me the most valuable lessons on forgiveness, charity, unconditional love and family.

I welcome these new years as my youngest children get ready to leave the nest. What a great time in my life to develop my talents and gifts.

I would like to look back at my experiences and say.....I took the road less traveled...and that by far has made all of the difference.

Carla